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QuietAsAMouse , 25 Apr 2016

Has councelling helped anyone?

Hi,

So I have been picking at my skin for as long as i can remember and have managed to scar the entirety of my body. It goes through phases of bad and ok depending on stress levels. My doctor keeps on at me to get councelling to deal with the anxiety and OCD side of things, but I really just hate talking to strangers who simply do not understand the issue. I have tried CBT before, but the councellor was more depressing than I was and just made me feel stupid and childish. I want to be able to stop and try and heal my scars as much as I can. I am fed up of this constant urge to scratch. I miss out on the nice clothes that show off shoulders and your back and I never learnt to swim well because I couldnt bear having my scars and wounds on show. My boyrfriend is unbelievably good about it all, but I feel like I have given him a bad deal and just want to look good for him and myself. So, if anyone has found concelling useful or has any handy tips I am all ears.

XX

2 Answers
ls100936
April 25, 2016

I think counseling would help if I find one I like. I feel like my counselor talked over me a lot and interrupted me when I wanted to say something important. I felt like he was aggressive in trying to convince me to try medication even though I was adamant I wanted to try natural methods first. I'm trying cbt techniques on my own and I think it helps. I am going to keep searching for a therapist I'm happy with.

mobiliser
May 01, 2016

I am a therapist therefore had to have 3 years of intense therapy myself. I opened my whole life up but I felt that when I disclosed my CSP towards the very end of my own journey as a client, that my therapist (unknowingly or not) skipped right over it, so I felt dismissed. I learnt there and then NEVER to treat one of my own clients the same way - and I tell all my clients that I am only human and will make mistakes and get it wrong sometimes, and that if I have missed them in any way to challenge me. In short, my therapy didn't stop me. Although I am not a CBT therapist, I am trained in it and it has some evidence base generally and I see they promote it here. I prefer Acceptance and Commitment Therapy which I learnt alongside my other theoretical background and used it to successfully kick smoking after 30 years - I feel if I did the same with CSP it might help but if I am honest I know what hard work it will be and it is not quite the right time for me. I cannot really understand why it is that there is no known 'cure' for CSP, that seems so discouraging. I know that part of the real change part of the therapy I practice is for the client to become aware of what is behind their behaviours and then become accepting of themselves, as they are. Sometimes this will be enough to build confidence levels enough to explore showing themselves compassion, which in turn leads to a reduction of distressing thoughts / behavours etc. I know from my own journey though, that lack of self acceptance and care is at the root of our behaviour and it is extremely challenging doing such raw and experiential work on the self and all our flaws (real or imagined) in therapy...and it can be the hardest part of life's journey. I am still on that journey...

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