Taking the first steps to recovery :)

Posted September 6th, 2012 by little-love
I have decided that enough is enough. I want to beat the skin picking this time! I have set myself the challenge of stopping completely. I'm not going to delude myself into thinking this will be easy, but I KNOW it is possible. I have been thinking back through my life, thinking of all the times I have missed out on things because I didn't want to show my face, thinking of all the times I have not enjoyed myself as I am constantly thinking about my face. I think I am closer to understanding why I do this to myself. I am always trying to please others and be what they perceive as perfect. But no more.I want to be me and do what I want to do. I want to get my nose pierced and get a tattoo and dye my hair crazy colours, but I don't because I worry what others will think and I will draw attention to myself and my skin. I am on my 4th day of no picking. These are always the worst because my skin is in the healing process and I get dry skin and stuff and I want to correct that, but already I can see the healing happening. I am going to keep a photo diary so I can see the change and I also have a paper diary in which I write down how I am feeling. I have also painted my nails (which I used to bite all the time, but some how I have gotten through that) so it detters me from picking as I don't want the polish to get ruined. I can do this, I really believe that this time will be the last.
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On November 4th, 2012 Rachel Green said:
I have a problem. I have a habit of picking the skin off both my upper and lower lip. Why do I do this, you ask? I really have know idea why. It is just a really awful terrible habit. It is not just like I pick off a little skin. Sometimes I pick the skin off so badly that my lips really bleed. And then as you can imagine after that my lips are sore, very sore. And that makes sense. I mean I am tearing off the skin so I can`t expect it to feel good. But I need to stop this habit. Sometimes I am really good-I think I have gone like a whole week without touching the skin on my lips. But eventually this stupid habit comes back. I really want to stop this but sometimes I get an impulse in my head like---oh, I wanna, pick, I wanna pick-- so most of the time I give in and I start tearing off the skin. I want to have smooth soft luscious lips but picking my lips does not make my lips attractive at all. I have a boyfriend and he is so great and he never comments on the state of my lips but he must notice sometimes that my lips are like.... not correct. He deserves to have a girlfriend who has nice lips for kissing purposes. If I do not want to end this picking lip problem habit for me then I should do it for him. What if I had to kiss someone with lips that were all... well so far from perfection. I don`t think I would like that too much. So I have some good reasons for wanting to stop picking the skin off my lips. But it is just when I get that strong impulse to pick, well the temptation is so strong. It is really hard to make myself say.--OK, Rachel listen to me. You are not going to touch your lips, OK?-- I need to be more disciplined. But maybe by reading other stories of other people who are struggling with similar situations like myself I will find encouragement and will be able to somehow overcome this problem I am trying to deal with. Sometimes after I have really picked my lips and they are very sore I use some Blistex-Medex lip balm and that helps soothe the pain a little and helps heal them and that would be great if that was the end of the story. But no, after they heal I usually pick them again and it is an on going story that never ends. So if anyone has any suggestions about how to stop this picking obsession please let me know.
On September 25th, 2012 little-love said:
I am waking up this morning to even clearer skin. I am getting there! I cannot wait till I am fully healed :3 Last night I treated myself to a bath and loads of goodies that make me feel good about myself and it was very relaxing which is good for me as I am a constant stress head. I think my plan is to go to the doctors when I have heales this time as I don't want to relapse. But I will have to wait a few weeks until I move up to uni to sort appointments and stuff. Also, I have been kind of punishing myself in a way these past few weeks. I have gotten some lovely new clothes nd makeup and stuff as it was my birthday but I am refraining from wearing them until I am healed. It is like my reward for doing well. Also, I don't feel good enough to wear them at this time because of my skin.I have been making myself stay indoors too for some 'me' time and to heal. I am actually doing this and I feel so good right now ^____^
On September 25th, 2012 Emmi said:
Im glad to hear you are healing :) and I think giving yourself the incentive with your clothes is a great Idea, you need to remember to go out side at least once a day, the vitamin D the sun gives is SO important for your skin.. keep up the great work tho :) well done :)
On September 26th, 2012 olivegreen said:
Not only is Vitamin D good for your skin, but it also helps reduce depression!! :)
On September 24th, 2012 little-love said:
so....I am now into my third week (i think) of no picking. After a little slip up last week, I am more determined than EVER to stop this. My skin is really starting to look healthy again. All the flakey bits are basically gone and I am waiting on the last of the scabby bits to clear then I will have decent skin :) When I am round the house I am trying not to wear makeup as it lets my skin breathe and it also helps me get used to how i look without it on. I clip my fringe back as this is the clearest part of my face and when I look at it it reminds me of what my WHOLE face can look like if I keep my hands off. I am moving back to uni on saturday and I want to feel happy makeupless in front of my housemates and I want to go out and party without the worry of my skin. When I look at my face, I try not to look too closely otherwise this is when I start to see 'imperfections' that to be honest don't really matter. If I am having to go up that close to see them, then they don't matter. I have decided that when my skin clears up I am going to try and wear as little makeup as possible. I will wear concealer and powder and nothing else. Makeup is made to make women feel they need to improve themselves and hide things. I don't want to have to NEED to wear it to feel better about my skin. Luckily I don't really have that much damage in the way of scarring, but it scares me to think if I carry on I probably will get scars and I don't want that. Everyday I wake up feeling more and more positive and I want to keep it like that. I am going to do this!!!!!!!!!^____^
On September 10th, 2012 TRYING_2_STOP said:
I have this same probulem, it started at 10 also, I've tried everything as well so I was just wondering if anyone on here knows of any 12 step programs out the're for this???
On September 7th, 2012 Emmi said:
Hooray!! this post makes me happy! Be who you want to be, we are very similar in a sense we always want others to perceive us as "Perfect", Im forever trying to get my skin "perfect" and my hair "Perfect" I even get fake nails because It makes me feel like Im more feminine, because thats what society sees as "perfect". Your stratigies are excellent ways of giving it up, to battle your dry skin use a Vitamin E moisturiser and keep your body hydrated, lots of fruits and veggies :) your skin will get better and keeping your skin healthy and hydrated the healing process will work faster. Use your piercings and tattoos as rewards to your self, when you achieve a goal, treat your self with a nose piercing, or a tattoo, even putting a colorful piece in your hair :) If you can stop biting your nails, you can stop picking your skin :) Good luck :) It sounds like a GREAT plan :)
On September 7th, 2012 little-love said:
Aww thats great to hear :3 I am sitting here with a lovely refreshing face mask as i speak! I went out this morning and I bought myself some new products that I am going to start using. I am going to throw all the old ones out as they are really harsh on my skin and i don't need them. I don't actually have acne, I just get the odd spot, which I then turn into a whole face of spots. I have some products now for sensitive skin which is what i need. I haven't picked at all and each day I feel more positive. It's my birthday tomorrow and I am going out clubbing and I want to feel good and forget about my skin. I hope that if I can overcome this, then it will inspire others too and show them we don't have to live the rest of our lives in shame x
On September 10th, 2012 Emmi said:
Happy Birthday for Yesterday!! Im sure your skin was looking great after your refreshing mask! :) good idea buying new products, I have very sensitive skin, to the point I have to use a soap free wash, and even then, I can only use a specific brand cause alot of them dry my skin out, I can also only use Maybaline makeup haha. Don't 'hope' you can over come this, Know that you will. :)
On September 10th, 2012 little-love said:
ah thanks! I had fun, I still worried about how i looked but thats just normal i supose when you are in a nightclub surrounded by loads of pretty girls! I have been really good, I had a little squeeze last night before bed, but I walked away from the mirror before any damage could be done and my skin is thanking me for it. all my scabs and stuff are almost healed and I am determined not to pick them! I have started using the simple skincare products as they are really gentle and i find that they are working! I have started being more open with my boyfriend too and I have been telling him when I want to pick and he has been really supportive :) I am feeling hopeful for the future. p.s I dyed my hair red and got a new haircut to reward myself x
On September 10th, 2012 Emmi said:
Honestly, I think even those 'Pretty Girls' get worried about how they look. In the end beauty comes from inside, and I bet your boyfriend thinks YOUR the most beautiful girl he's ever seen. How exciting, I love red hair. I recently got my hair cut too, it was a way of rewarding myself of other things, but it made a WORLD of diffrence. :) Theres nothing wrong with having a squeeze of a pimple, EVERYBODY does it, its the constant picking afterwards we have to keep an eye on. Its amazing how you can have a small conversation with someone on a forum and honeslty barely know them at all, and feel SO proud of their achievements. Well done :)
On September 11th, 2012 little-love said:
I know, just because we punish ourselves, it doesn't mean we shouldn't reward ourselves :0) One thing I have noticed over the past week or so is that I seem to be becoming ever so slightly more comfortable each day with having a spot or mark on my face. Some mornings I wake up and I just cannot be bothered to stand there for ages and keep reapplying makeup because I know no matter how much i reapply it i will still worry about my face throughout the day. Its also really exhausting to keep doing that. Like today I had a spot on my chin which I just left alone and I barely thought about it because I went out and did something instead and I honestly dont think anyone even cared if i had a spot and because i left it alone it is almost gone now! Everyday I am seeing an improvement and i am growing in confidence that I can beat this. Its just nice to have someone to talk to that understands and its really nice how supportive you are, I have seen you writing on other threads and its great that you are trying to help others :3 Thankyou!
On September 12th, 2012 Emmi said:
(The first part of this comment is the one below)Oh, also I've been reading a book, and it talks about goal setting, and how you must write your goals down, get them out on paper and have them in front of you, but in a sense that they have already happened, so rather then writing "I will not pick" "I will have nice skin" you should write it as "I don't pick at my skin" "My skin is healthy and beautiful". If you talk as tho it is at present time, then your subconscious mind makes it happen as tho it is present time, if you talk about it like it is in the future, your subconscious mind is always thinking in future terms.. also setting a date, pick a date in 1 months time, say the 12th of October.. on this day, your skin will be completely healed.. Maybe you want to give it 2 months, depending on what situation your spots are in. you have to read them no less then twice a day, morning and night, More if you can bring them with you. When you read them, you need to really believe they are happening. Its a technique that has been working since the 1800's, the book is for a nutrition plan, but the basic principles can be use for anything. I keep my goals on laminated cards in my purse, with pictures of how I want to look, Ive given myself 49 days to do it in :) This is honestly the best advise I have EVER received. :) I hope this helps to improve your situation. :) xx
On September 12th, 2012 Emmi said:
Im really glad that you are becoming more and more comfortable in your own skin, so to speak. The hardest thing for me was accepting the fact that no one cared as much about how my skin looked as I do. Once I realized it tho, I felt more free to do the things I wanted to do, wear clothes I wanted to wear, and be proud of the fact I was overcoming my fears. I felt a sense of relief. I started to focus on my better features, I really love eyes, I think there a beautiful feature and I personally think I have nice eyes, so I started putting all my focus on how nice they were, and rather then saying to my self 'look how bad my skin is today' I'd look in the mirror and think 'Wow my eyes look really green today' or 'gee this color makes my eyes pop' you would be surprised how helpful or has been, and with Red hair, your eyes, no matter what color are going to 'Pop' I think red hair in general makes peoples eyes stand out. :) The less make up you can put on, the faster your spots will heal, when your sitting at home, take your make up off, give them a chance to breath, By all means wear it to go out in public, I sure couldn't leave the house without mine, but while your at home, remove it, give your skin a chance :) It will take a week or two and your skin will be looking SO much better. Its really a great feeling knowing that you and others are finding my suggestions helpful :) It makes my day :)
For information on the skin picking disorder (Dermatillomania), symptoms, causes and treatment methods, get the Complete Guide to Skin Picking Disorders.