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arkag , 11 Sep 2012

I'm stopping

I am 21 year old female and have been picking since highschool I believe. I'm not sure when it Got really bad but my fourth year of university was the absolute worst for it. I have desperately tried to stop with no success. I feel like if I keep a journal on here and have people to talk to about it I will feel more accountable and might be able to stop. I would like to try my absolute best on my own to stop before seeking medical attention. Areas I pick (listed be severity) Private region Fingers Face Scalp Very embarassing for me to admit that I pick at my Private region but I need to be honest and I hope I can help people Who have similar issues. My private region is the most concerning for me. I think I do it because it's easily concealable and because the way the hair grows there it Causes bumps which has improved from havin laser hair Removal on the bikini line. The past few days have been very bad for me as I have been stressed about a job interview I have tomorrow. Stress is a definite trigger for me. I plan to start a log tomorrow so I will check back in then and start my Journey one day at a time.
31 Answers
SpottyFace
September 20, 2012

In reply to by arkag

Hi sweetheart! I completely understand and I am going through the exact same thing as we speak (type). Your progress isn't ruined!! Just pick yourself up and keep going...it's worth it! Think about what caused you to slip so you can be aware of it in the future. For me, it's going into the bathroom with a brightlight and leaning towards the mirror...that has disaster written all over it. However, I'm pretty stressed right now and I slipped on Sunday. I went to the aftercare clinic last night and had to explain to a doctor what I did. (There was no possible story/scenario that I could have come up with to explain it) So, here I sit at home, called in sick from work, horrified at what I did to myself. But I'm healing with antibiotics and forgiveness (forgiving myself). Just know that you are not alone!
arkag
September 20, 2012

In reply to by SpottyFace

Thank you so much for you response. My trigger is the exact same thing -- bright lights and mirrors. I just need to stay away from them. I hope that your healing goes well. I'm getting ready to restart my progress again. I am so determined to stop this or get it to a level that is manageable for me.
SpottyFace
September 20, 2012

In reply to by arkag

You Can! You can absolutely stop this and take control, so can I , and everyone else who wants it. Once these current sores heal, I'm determined not to create another one. I'm so tired of always being embarrassed of how I look and hiding inside. My sores are starting to really leave scars and this staph infection has scared me. I'm hoping and praying that the antibiotics work and that it will heal, even if there is a scar. I'll keep the scar as a reminder of this frightening and humiliating experience...as motivation not to do it ever again! Hope you know that you have at least one person rooting for your success...please let me know how you're doing.
olivegreen
September 21, 2012

In reply to by arkag

Hi arkag!! Keep a positive attitude! Here's my (probably maternal) attitude about your relationship comment--if you get into a relationship where the other person doesn't accept you for who you are, and where you don't feel comfortable (maybe in time) to explain your skin issue, then that person isn't the person for you anyway. You can do it, don't give up!!! :)
arkag
September 27, 2012
UPDATE I am feeling really good about my picking, the last couple days I have been completely pick free- not even consciously, I just have not felt the compulsion to pick for some reason. I almost did today -- I was so close but then I just stopped myself. I think that NOT having tweezers or anything near by to pick with helped me to reject the idea because I would need to consciously get up and go get the tweezers. Thank goodness! A huge motivation for me stopping is also that I really need to see a doctor about an unrelated health issue, but it would require all of my scabs to be seen so I really want to stop that way I won't be embarrassed to see the doctor (I realize this is ridiculous but it's the honest truth about how embarrassed I am about the situation)
valentine
September 30, 2012

In reply to by arkag

arkag, Congratulations on your progress. You mention, however, that you still have tweezers in the house (not nearby, but still somewhere, that is) which, for me, anyway, sounds like a picking session waiting to happen. One way I've gotten around needing to tweeze my eyebrows but not keeping tweezers around 24/7 is to buy a super-cheap pair of tweezers, like 3.99 or something, when I need to tweeze my eyebrows and then I break them in half and throw them out. It might seem wasteful, spending that much every three to four weeks or so, but I figure it's a lot less than an actual salon visit for eyebrow waxing would be. Anyway, just a suggestion. Keep up the good work!
arkag
October 01, 2012

In reply to by valentine

Hi valentine! Yes, I agree that having tweezers out of the house would be ideal. I was stating with my parents for a bit and so my mom had tweezers around and I also live with 7 female roommates so its almost unavoidable. Though I am seriously considering throwing away my own pair now that you've brought this up, seems helpful.
arkag
October 08, 2012
HI, I hope everyone is doing well. Just wanted to update on my progress! I have been almost entirely pick free for the last week, today I did pick a bit which is unfortunate but other than the spots I just picked my skin is healing really well. I looked good enough at the end of last week that I was able to see a doctor without being embarrassed of marks. As I mentioned before my biggest problem area is my bikini line area....I hate saying that outloud but that is my issue. Luckily for this I can hide it on a day to day basis which almost makes it harder to stop picking because I know there are few times when the area actually has to be seen. With that being said --- laser hair removal has helped tremendously; this is because I know it is the whole female hair maintenance thing (shaving / waxing) that causes irritation and then picking. By removing the hair entirely I am able to get rid of the initial irritation and thus my picking is reduced so I am thankful for this. I plan to go this entire week without picking even once. I am going to try to exhibit all the self control I can possibly find to do this and I'm sure it is going to go well. Here is to healing and recovering!

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