The decision to undertake counseling for skin picking

Dr. Rujuta Vinod
Aug 31st, 2009

One can view online therapy as an interesting useful item displayed in a showcase of a particular shop. Viewers respond to this “item on display” in 3 ways: 1. Some look at it, find it useful but postpone the idea of buying it immediately. One day, they might think of asking for more information about it. 2. Some find it interesting, stand in front of it, inquire more about it, and wish to have it, ask for its price tag and ultimately take its smaller version for a trial. 3. Some feel a pull towards it. Their eyes get glued to it, they find it compulsory to go inside and ask for its various versions and price tags. They feel happy as they were in search for such a thing for quite some time and found it unexpectedly.

What happens when a person has an encounter with an object of his need/interest?

Our personality has multiple parts as a normal common phenomenon. Our self contains a child, a son, a daughter, a man, a woman, a mother, a father, a brother, a sister, a housewife, a professional, a neighbor, a friend, a gardener, a laundryman, a banker, an investor, a spouse, a student, a teacher …. In the process of decision making, two parts of us having opposite views surface in our conscious mind and get into a dialogue. One part of the pair could be a top dog (a dominant one) and another underdog (not quite sure of itself). If one part takes a back seat, then decision is made as per the wish of the dominant one. There occurs a temporary resolution. If both these parts fight with equal strength for dominance, then, no decision is made and the issue is kept pending…thus the issue is swallowed and is kept unresolved. We all carry such a baggage of unresolved issues right from our early age.

What happens during the process of decision making?

The two parts with opposite views present pros and cons of each decision (i.e. of YES and of NO) to each other. Each decision making involves essentially some reward and some loss. We all universally feel that we need to go for obvious rewards and we never wish to have its inherent losses. We get both as a package whether we like it or not, whether we are prepared for it or not. So, we decide on the basis of us being comfortable with the losses in that package. If, one can see a gain in a temporary loss, one wins.

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