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OBrien1982 , 10 Jun 2010

Help with girlfriend please

My girlfriend has just been diagnosed with dermatillomania. I'm looking for some tips apart from the obvious that I can do to help her and hopefully see if we can treat it effectively. Any suggestions are welcome. Thanks
6 Answers
wildflower
June 10, 2010
i recommend the both of you to read through the topics here that might apply as there's a lot of information within them. you may ask more specific questions or provide comments within them . there's also a lot of information on the menus on this site and there's an online book on stoppickingonme.com as well as similar topics posted within that site's discussion forum. more and more sites are being created about this disorder too. information is power when dealing with anything. being compassionate, informed, and supportive toward her is about all you can do but that is very important. all the best to both of you.
Mardy Bum
June 10, 2010
One thing I would recommend is being gentle when you tell her that she is picking (if she wants you to tell her) rather than (as a past boyfriend has done) shout 'Oi, stop it' or 'stop picking' in a loud voice as this may make her feel ashamed and become embarrased. I don't know if other people find this but when you say 'I can't stop picking it's really getting me down' the other person in the room will always say 'why?' every time. It might just be me but I hate it, It's very difficult to describe to someone the reason why we pick, it just happens so I think the best thing you can do is just support her and remind her she is beautiful as there will be times (particularly after picking) that she will feel very down about her looks. Best of luck.
OBrien1982
June 11, 2010

In reply to by Mardy Bum

Thanks that's really helpful. I have looked around in this forum and there are so many people using so many creams and remedies. Can anyone tell me what seems to be the most popular choice? She is using a couple at the moment but I don't think they are very good. She is also worried about scarring and I wondered if anybody had any good tips regarding that? Thanks for your replies
wildflower
June 11, 2010

In reply to by OBrien1982

she should use what her dermatologist recommends. other than that, skin needs little more than soap and water and a moisturizer. i've posted a regimen that is working for me in this topic ................................. http://www.skinpick.com/node/922 ........ A healthy skin healing guide to help stop picking ........
OBrien1982
June 11, 2010

In reply to by Mardy Bum

Thanks that's really helpful. I have looked around in this forum and there are so many people using so many creams and remedies. Can anyone tell me what seems to be the most popular choice? She is using a couple at the moment but I don't think they are very good. She is also worried about scarring and I wondered if anybody had any good tips regarding that? Thanks for your replies
jenna90
June 11, 2010
hey there, I have dermatillomania and a wonderful boyfriend who cares too. Things he's done which have been so helpful have included just listening. Not always completely understanding obviously but listening. It's not easy to tell people about this disorder and so far in my life only two people know and having that one person to just release it to makes a huge difference. Also, he encourages me to stop, tells me that I have the strength and I can do this. Theres times its easy to give up or be 'half-hearted' about it, if it wasn't for him telling me that I am able, I don't know if I would fully believe that I am. It's really important to be gentle about it all, as we're already very ashamed and broken over it. There's times it's been so bad that I dont go out for a week or two and I can't even look at my boyfriend, hiding behind my hair in shame. He speaks to me about it, which helps, tells me there's a way out, encourages me and loves me through it. Best thing you can do. And yer, practically too, yesterday he draped a piece of this beautiful fabric over my mirror and its unbelievable how much that's taken away the temptation. He's also bought candles for me so that I can shower by candlelight and not the bathroom light where I get most tempted. Yer, lots you can do with finding out about those creams etc you're asking about. Wildflower has posted some awesome tips and products in the forum. Hey, if you can, this site is an awesome place and really really has helped me, with just the info, support, questions etc. If you can get your girlfriend onto here, it may help her too. :) Cheers

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