Find out the severity of your symptoms with this free online test
My picking is consuming my life, and ruining my relationship with the man who will be my husband in less than three weeks. Let me state, I pick EVERYTHING. I pick at my cuticles to the point of them bleeding. I chew my nails. I pick ingrown hairs. I pick blackheads. Pimples. I pick the back of my arms. I pick my back. I pull out strands of hair with split ends and tear the ends. I have chewed off the skin on the inside of my cheeks. I chew on my lips. I can not stop. I can not look at my fiance's face without my eyes hunting for something on HIS face to pick at. I can't run my fingers through his hair without them hunting for something to scrape off his scalp. I am taking breaks between typing to tear at an uneven fingernail. I wasn't always this bad. I'm mortified, and I don't know what to do. About ten years ago I had issues with self mutilation, cutting. I also had issues with eating, and dealt with intentionally starving myself for control. I've beaten those things. But they were conscious actions. I knew what I was doing; I was ritualizing it. The constant picking I manifest now is something that I do without realizing I'm doing it. For a while I coated my finger tips with vitamin E and wore band-aids. I would moisturize, moisturize, moisturize and sleep with moisturizing gloves on. I actually got my cuticles back to a normal state. My mom took me to get a manicure to "celebrate" my accomplishment. They ended up "trimming" my cuticles, which caused them to grow back jagged, and caused me to regress back to constantly picking again. Wearing the band-aids worked, but they were horribly embarrassing. I work in an office situation, and people watch me type regularly. I received several inquiries about the band-aids, and it was awkward to explain them. Not to mention, they only fixed part of the problem. I don't know what to do. I'm at my wit's end. I want to have healthy, in tact fingers at my wedding so I won't be ashamed to show off my new wedding band. I don't want the back of my arms covered in scabs. I don't want to be caught off-guard in pictures with my mouth in a raspberry because I'm secretly tearing off the skin on the inside of my mouth (not to mention the wrinkles I've already developed as a result of that.) I don't want to be ashamed anymore. I need help. Thank you for reading, and for any advice you may be able to give.