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momofapicker , 11 Oct 2010

Do most pickers have other emotional issues?

Hi, I just found this site. I am writing because I am a Mother of a Daughter who has picked ALL over her body since she was about 4 years old. She is now 19 y/o. She also suffers from APD Avoidance Personality Disorder. She has been in counciling since she was 11. None of it has seemed to help. My question is..... Do most people or all people who pick have other emotional issues? How can I help her? I am a single mother 50 y/o widow my husband was an alcoholic and he passed away from endstage liver failure 6yrs on Thanksgiving Day. My husbands issues and the emotional and mental abuse we all went through combined with the guilt my daughter suffers from not making amends with her father before he died and many other issues have resulted in most of my daughters problems. I have 3 children My daughter who picks her twin sister 19 and a son 21...they all live with me. I have a very limited income and no insurance to help my daughter with further counciling. Mom
1 Answer
October 17, 2010
I would say most of us do, but I can't speak for everyone. You sound like a great mom. You can help her by being supportive and non-judgmental and never shunning her because of picking. I think the best thing is to be able to have a non-stressful openness between you and your daughter about it, while still respecting that she may feel embarrassed and private about it at times. She will probably have to find her own journey to recovery, but it will be more successful if you are supportive of it her during that time (and it is a long time). Also - setbacks do not mean she is not trying, so please do not be angry and cruel with her when she has an episode or setback. Her other siblings will probably feel that she is taking up time and attention, and will not understand that picking is not a purposeful attention-getting behavior. I don't know why people do not understand this, as it is horrible, unimaginably embarrassing and alienating, often incredibly painful physically, and nothing good comes of it attention-wise. If you cannot convey this to her siblings, I don't know. But it can be a huge problem.

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