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ATSMITH , 17 Apr 2011

I was 16 when I started "picking".

I went through a really rough situation in my teens only to find out I was pregnant as a product of this situation. This is when the picking started, and just for a little background info, earlier, before I was pregnant I went through a depression stage where I cut myself as well. So I thought it was a way of making myself better without hurting myself...well Im 22 now. And still picking, I go through stages where I rarely pick, but then again no one can see my legs....or my stomach....or my chest...or my upper arms....but they see the marks on my forearms and face. Ive literally starting picking every part of my body, I hate it. It's affecting my sex life with my husband, Im fair skinned so I scar very easily as well which doesnt help. I highly dislike being naked around my husband when my picking reaches it's peak. Even now as Im typing this, i look down and i can count at LEAST 14 scabs combined on my forearms. Its really bad at the moment...probably the worst it's ever been. Im not ugly or disgusting by any means....but I feel like I am...I hate that summer is coming because I dont know if my current scabs will heal in time for it to not be obvious. And people comment on it to, it's embarassing. My husband wants to know why I cant just stop doing it, and I try explaining that at this point, I dont even know Im doing it. I dont understand this...I wish I did. My daughter sees it to and I dont want her to get my bad habits. I've found that stress is a big factor, the more stressed I am, the worse it gets. I hate defending myself when people bring it up. Like I said, if I cant understand can I explain it to someone else?? Has anyone else had to 'defend" this compulsive disorder? Because thats exactly what it is...Its a form of OCD, are there any tricks people have learned to stop doing it?
2 Answers
April 17, 2011
I too believe I have this disorder and have been with my spouse for along time and yet am still embarrassed when he sees me with no makeup... I am fairly lucky that I dont pick everywhere, but I pick my face and its really hard to hide. I can't even go one day without wearing makeup because I feel so ashamed. I dont know how to explain to people whats going on... and because of that feel so alone!
April 18, 2011

In reply to by cjg

For the first 5 years I didnt pick anything but my face, but when people started asking about it, I switched to places I could hide it. And I know what you mean by feeling matter how you try to explain it, everyones response is "Well just quit doing it"....and it's not even close to being that easy....Ive even had people accuse me of being on drugs (meth addicts pick at themselves), Ive never touched anything like that in my life. I'd love to be able to stop...I just...dont know where to start...

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