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Hey everyone! It's been a couple of days since I've written so I figured I'd start with my weekend (days 7 and 8). I JUST got over the flu yesterday and it's been absolute MISERY not being able to workout (I didn't have the energy to do much of anything, including posting on here). This made the past few days especially hard for me to not focus on the ONE thing I've been working SO HARD to avoid, my skin. I've been using my daily workouts and writing on this forum as a form of therapy, to make getting through each day of this challenge just a little bit easier, while forming new, HEALTHY habits to occupy my free time. On a positive note, I'm on day 9 of NO PICKING and it feels AMAZING! :) I know it's only been 9 days, but that's HUGE for me. When I owned tweezers, I would pick on a daily basis. I didn't always cause "serious" damage each time I would pick- sometimes, I would just use my tweezers to pull off dry, loose skin surrounding the wounded areas that were in the healing process from previous intense, skin-picking sessions. Regardless of how minor or severe, picking is picking. Now that there's been ZERO picking, my skin is healing and I mean REALLY healing. It's been SO LONG since I've seen my skin repair itself NATURALLY. It's incredible to SEE how damaged skin repairs itself and heals when given the opportunity. I wish I had been informed or made aware of this disorder, and the severity of it, years ago when my skin-picking became more prevalent. What's done is done. It's not a productive use of my time or energy to focus on something I can no longer change. I've realized that our present quickly becomes our past with every decision we make and every action we take. I tell myself this EVERY TIME I get the urge to walk up to a mirror and look into it too closely. I can make the choice to be strong and walk away, a decision I KNOW I can look back on and ultimately be proud of... OR, I can be weak and give into the urge/temptation, resulting in an action I WILL regret minutes, hours, even days from now that I won't be able to change. I'm TIRED of living this way! I've FINALLY reached that point where I'm DONE feeling sorry for myself and ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! Dermatillomania IS NOT who I am, it's what I suffer from and I WILL NOT let it define me as a TYPE of person NOR will I let it take over MY LIFE! This disorder has stolen 7 YEARS of my life and I REFUSE to let it take another second away from me! This is MY LIFE and I'm taking back control! My 21-day challenge is a good start, but I want more. I want a life that DOESN'T include skin-picking (dermatillomania) and I DESERVE that freedom- WE ALL DO!!!
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