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I only just began to realize this.
I think I must have some severe anxiety issues. I am 16. As long as I can remember, I've ripped open my flesh. I'd scratch myself because I liked to watch my skin ooze. I rip off scabs. I worry any bumbs that appear on my skin. I cut open or pop zits. I tear at dry patches of skin until they're rubbed raw. Sunburn is the worst. I go to town on peeling sunburn. I've pulled out my hair for years, too. I'm more in control of it than I was when I was, say, ten, eleven years old. But I still do it. I still glare at the unevenness of my hair that I've caused myself and try to think of a way to make it less obvious. I pick my skin. I rip off scabs. I yank out hair. I bite my lip. I can't just stop. It's compulsive, I've come to recognize. And, hello the internet. I've learned a little more about it. I'm currently curled up in an armchair with a roll of toilet paper to catch the blood that's dripping down my leg. I just couldn't leave alone my burn. I'm tired of scars. I'm tired of bleeding. I'm tired of ponytails every day. Does anyone have any short term solutions? I know I should probably seek out professional help. It would be nice to get to the roots of my issues. But my mother doesn't need to be freaked right now. And I can't afford it. So for the time being, are there ways I can keep myself in check?
May 06, 2011
i know this seems drastic but just run with me on this for a min please, so i like to donate my hair to locks of love so i have decided that this year after my birthday im gonna get my hair cut super short but long enough i can still style it with little spikes like pink but because i want to change my hair daily and have all sorts of styles im just gonna wear wigs and i know ur thinking thats alot of money, but im unemployed rite now and when i find a job i plan on just buying 1 or 2 a month off ebay the prices are really great i know cutting ur hair super short or even shaving it doesnt sound great but there isnt much u can do for ur hair line abut if ur wearing wigs u can straighten them instead of pulling out ur hair i wish u the best of luck
May 06, 2011
Ditto with my mum and not being able to afford it. I never thought my picking was a 'problem' as such, either, but the thing with sunburn is exactly what I used to do. When I was about ten, I got this really awful sunburn and I remember peeling it off right down until it bled, didn't matter where I was at the time.