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I am a 24 year old female and I have been picking my fingers since I can remember, I sometimes even peel the skin back to the knuckle and under the fingers which causes pain to the point I avoid washing may hands because it stings so badly. I have caused my nails to become ridged and a couple have faint thin brown lines on the nail bed (has anyone had this before?) I am so embarrased of how they look I avoid letting people see them; sometimes when people notice and ask whats wrong/or whats happened to them I try and make up an excuse. My husband hates me doing it although he accepts me for who I am how my fingers 'look' doesnt bother him, its the fact im hurting myself that bothers him. I didnt have the easiest childhood witnessing alot of family physical/emotional abuse, I vaguely remember my childhood which I can only conclude I have physchologically blocked it out to avoid further pain. Although others consider me attractive I can not see it and contantly find things to dislike myself for, I am very hard on myself and my appearence, I have had eating disorders, suffered from depression, alcohol abuse and panic attacks before. I guess I am looking for help/advice from anyone who has had or been through anything similar to me? I would really love to be able to stop destroying my hands so I can be normal physically, but everytime I try I may stop for a couple of weeks then I start again and cause them to bleed, become inflammed and very painful again. Not to mention cause further trauma to the nail. Not only that but I want so badly to be emotionally normal so I can quit this self mutilation. Is there a way to stop this? has anybody tried something before which has helped them to cure this problem? any help or advice would be greatly appreciated!!