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behindmakeup , 25 Dec 2011

Realising I have Dermatillomania

What a christmas present waking up from the night before of intense picking on my face I realised this is not normal and googling today and really looking into ocd of scar picking reading other stories on here brought me to tears because I never thought I can relate more. I believe I am Dermatillomania Looking back it started around 11 biting obsessively at my gums, then I went through depression, whenever i had a spot on my arm I'd pick in class it got to the point I had 20 scars on my right arm and people noticed. I bite my nails so picking scars were hard, so I used pencils, tweezers. anything. to pick. Around 15 I stopped the picking, and the doctors said it was "self harm" i guess through depression you sort of believe it. the old scars have heeled but when i sunbathe they come out. Then I started to get spots on my face around 16 it was the odd spot, and it would leave a scar but I hated seeing a spot so I'd pick till the surface was not raised, put makeup ontop and my skin looked flawless. I am turning 20, the scars are now back on my arms, my chest, all over my back and my face. I used to be a pretty girl, with makeup on I can look fine and no one would know what I had. But if i stay over at friends i have to wear makeup the whole night or get up extrmeely early to put on to hide this. Last night I took a towel and rubbed it all over my scars and fast as I could till i felt the skin rub off. It was so painful and I wish I have never done it. its now going to effect every day life as i have not only scars now on my face but big patches of broken skin that not even makeup will hide. Its an embarressing, shameful habit. And im just kind of glad and relieved that I've realised i HAVE a problem , im not alone and that I need to stop this.
1 Answer
December 28, 2011
I can really relate to your story, I'm so glad I found this site too. I started young as well, a out grade five and the thought of stopping such a long standing habit after so many failed attempts is daunting. I'm hoping that by connecting with people who have similar issues I will be able to find the support I need to overcome this. I'm curious about ways you have tried to stop and if some things work better than others for you?

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