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packrat , 30 Dec 2011

Parents and Children

Hi, My wife and I are dealing with this issue. She picks the skin from around her cuticles and fingers as a stress relief. We are working through it, but a new issue has come up. Now that we have kids, there is concern that this behavior will be seen and mimicked by our daughters. Has anyone had any experience in this? Can this run in the family and be picked up by the children? Has anyone noticed their children following in their footsteps or has anyone been influenced by their parent's habits? I would appreciate any insight anyone might have. Thanks
8 Answers
Basta
December 30, 2011
It can run in families because children copy their parents' behaviors. My mother and father still pick and have always picked and I have always picked too :(
packrat
December 30, 2011

In reply to by Basta

Thanks, you guys are great! I also talked to a doctor who said that mimicing can be a trigger, but there are also other components. It sounds like there is a chance our kids will follow in their mother's footsteps, but not a guarantee. Do you think your parents were a big influence?
aprilmarie
January 02, 2012

In reply to by packrat

My dad always picked at his thumbs and it made a noise which drove my mother crazy. Now I find myself doing the same thing, but way worse than he ever did. I'm missing some of the skin on my thumbs and middle fingers and what isn't picked off is calloused over or too painful to remove. When I was younger I gave my mother manicures and pedicures and seeing the dry skin on her fingers and toes was definitely a trigger for me. When she noticed that I was literally removing some of her skin, she stopped having me give her mani's and pedi's. So when I wasn't able to pick her skin, I picked mine. I hope your little one doesn't acquire this horrible disorder. Good Luck to your wife and family!
takecare
December 30, 2011
I think it can be mimicked by young ones who are watching. I have been picking for some time and I have noticed that my little sister bites her nails and picks her skin if it is coming off. Although I try not to pick when I'm near her, and she has stopped a little. All I can say is lead by example :)
shirtyberty
January 01, 2012
I've noticed that my 10 year old sister has started picking the skin on her thumb and it looks pretty bad. I don't know whether she's doing it because she's copying me or what, but also when I was about 6 or 7 my friend also started picking her lips but stopped soon after. We used to do everything together (and still do) but I don't know whether she was copying me or not. So yes I think that children do copy when they see other people picking.
caitlin90
January 02, 2012
Yes, the behaviors run through families. Either it's by seeing them or it's inherent. My mom picked her skin and fingers unknowingly in front of me as a child. I started picking in kindergarten (much earlier than most people) and I think it was because I saw her do it. Keep a watchful eye out for your daughters even if your wife stops the behavior, because your daughters may discover the addiction on their own or from a friend at school.
Pretty Pressure
January 06, 2012
Yes, I think it plays a big role. My mother picked her entire life, but she never noticed the problem because she was dark skinned and didn't scar hardly as much as I do. I pretty fair, so I can't get a paper-cut without it scarring. She picked when she wasn't thinking, which was bad when she got very sick and she would reach over and pick large spots without thinking. I've picked since before I could remember. Ever since she died I feel like my picking has gone into overdrive, and when I do it in certain spots, I think of her.
kylie75
January 22, 2012
Yes...I do it and now my 6yr daughter is also doing it!!!:( however dont know if this counts but she also suffers anxiety - (so do i) - my other daughter doesnt do it... None of my parents did it - or relatives that i know of .....but i think its just what they see mummy do. Sorry nothing good to tell you---

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