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hi. i am posting this because i am going to use it as an update for how i am doing. i am doing great at the moment, infact so great i cannot recall exactly how many days i havent picked for! this is real progress believe me. i usually would know precisely because the time span between picks would be very short, a few days maximum and it would seem like months due to the intense energy needed to stop myself picking. Now since finding this site it seems i have had some sort of miraculous turnaround. Not only have i not picked, except a scratch here and there, but i also seem to have been released from the 'prison' which has controlled me for many, many years. The picking has controlled me and never the other way round - until now. I feel a freedom that is so exciting and a much healthier body probably due to my immune system having a break, ie not having to deal with sabatage. One thing though, because i am not picking i am being saturated with 'feelings'/memories, etc. i know i picked for several reasons, not always due to complications but can clearly see now how much i picked to change my focus. i would use picking as an ESCAPE quite a lot of the time. Of course now i can see that the picking then caused the inability to deal healthily with any emotions. talk about double whammy. anyhow i need to get some of these things out and i know this site is my sanctuary. this is where i have found such intense relief because i feel safe sharing on here because all of you share the same habit, different areas/methods maybe, but the same habit and desire to stop. this is really to say thank you and i may be a little addicted to this site but i tell you from the bottom of my heart i would rather be addicted to adding to this site than picking. this is healthy, picking is not. it affected not only my self-esteem with shame, etc, it hurt my skin, my eyes, my glands, my hands, my fingers, my thyroid, my temperature, appetite, sleep, gave me fatigue, fear, energy levels (massive lows), depression, inability to think clearly (too obsessed with giving up and never giving up!), self-loathing and not doing what i wanted, ie live a good, healthy life. phew - think i have covered most things there. anyhow, right now i am clearing through a few 'to do' lists - i have found that i get burdened with too many things i have not done, some small but eventually they add up and i get stressed. now i have more time and i am using it positively - at last. any other things that help i will keep posting because it is like being a member of a big supportive club. i feel that since knowing there are so many of us working towards the same goal i never feel alone with my problem and that i am therefore released from the chains that have held me back. thankyou!