Commitment!


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March 24, 2012

day 38...ugh i picked...not a whole lot but i still did it! Tmrw is a new day :)
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March 25, 2012

day 39...just did my first show of hairspray tonight!it went well...i got fast food but i did not pick! woot :)
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March 25, 2012

okay seriously! i was just about to get in the shower and i picked! ugh curses!!
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March 26, 2012

day 40! Did not pick! hooray!
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March 27, 2012

day 27 No pick monday! woot!
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March 28, 2012

day 28 This has been such a wonderful place for me to pretty much journal my feelings so thank you all for being so lovely towards me and my journey. I had a day off and i was doing pretty well until i just sat down and had a small session...nothing too bad but my mom freaked out! oops...heres to a better tmrw :)
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March 29, 2012

day 29...ugh i picked! in some way I'm punishing myself for being a bad christian...ugh ugh. tmrw is a new day.
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March 29, 2012

day 30...staying strong...first therapy session in about 30 minutes! :)
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March 30, 2012

day 31.... staying strong...i have this new log that i have to fill out when i pick...its making me not want to pick! hooray!
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April 02, 2012

day 32 was horrible! i picked my breasts, back, face, and chest...i knew it was coming! right when i sat down it happened so fast! Ugh. day 33 went well though! :)
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April 02, 2012

day 33...needless to say i picked here's to positive thinking!
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April 02, 2012

day 34...trying not to pick...scratched some off my back...but no where else!
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April 03, 2012

day 34 cont...totally picked... ineed to learn to let the ones i already picked heal!!
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April 04, 2012

day 35...deff just picked...staying strong! :)
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April 05, 2012

day 36 did well today...a couple little scratches but nothing bad!
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April 05, 2012

day 37...staying strong!
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April 06, 2012

day 37...i picked ugh!
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April 06, 2012

My English is not very good and I am new here. Me too, I need a commitment. I am gonna battle with you. I can imagine what you are going through. My day one is today! I picked a lot today. My aim is to pick only on one day a week (monday). And I'm gonna write a post every day. I'll keep my fingers crossed for us!
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April 06, 2012

thats wonderful! Just know to not be so tough on yourself if you slip! we all do! I will keep you in my prayers:)
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April 07, 2012

37 cont...i picked even more.. love my show but i really need some time off so i can settle in and focus on myself!
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April 08, 2012

day 38...it is so hard for me to focus and NOT pick...im so tired lately that i just don't have the energy to stop and it takes a lot!
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April 08, 2012

it's one of those nights where i am crying myself to sleep. I want to fight this so bad. It hurts me physically, emotionally, and spiritually. i am sure many of us have come to that point where we are naked...literally and mentally and emotionally in front of the mirror and we see this ugly creature. when actually it isn't that bad. I have learned to forgive myself but i must not dismiss the behavior as "okay" to do. Where can you draw the line? It's comforting when friends call me pretty and i don't ask...obviously i am caked in makeup but it still boosts my confidence. can't wait until my next therapy session. Obviously this is something so deep...i am officially going to a good college and i believe it is God's path for me but there is some issue or issues that lie beneath and they are eating away at me...I need to stop this. Everyday I fear marriage and finding a loved one who will accept me for who I am...picking and all. Hmm maybe i will have combatted it by then! who knows. Wish me luck. I love you all and thank you for being so supportive!
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April 09, 2012

day 39...consciously stopped myself tonight...thats good!
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April 09, 2012

You're doing such a great job so far! I admire your determination. It seems that every time I make a commitment, I break it within a few days. I hope you won't mind if I join in with my progress within this comment stream. It really helps to post progress - it's more motivating. :)
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April 10, 2012

day 40...scratched in the car but did well after :)
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April 12, 2012

day 41....DANG IT!
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April 12, 2012

hang in there! I'm new here and i want to hold myself accountable too!!! so far today would be my day 1 i guess and i have not picked!!! it's early still but i really hope i can keep this up. my make up is looking good today so i want it to stay that way! i saw you are going to go to penn state and major in education- i took an official visit there when i was college hunting and i also wanted to be an education major- but i went to the university of virginia instead- and ended up being rejected from the education program- BOO!!! but best of luck to you! thats a HUGE school!!! i'm sure it will be a lot of fun too! :-D
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April 13, 2012

Thank you for your support! I am hoping that when i go to college i can be stronger about this!
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April 13, 2012

day 42...did better today...want skin to be better!
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April 14, 2012

you can do it :) hope i can learn from your commitment.
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April 14, 2012

day 43 (yesterday) didn't pick! did therapy and then i took a bath when i got home to calm my nerves...i think it works! :)
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April 15, 2012

day 44. just got home...turned mirror around and getting in shower Hooray! I only scratched a couple...but none on my back!
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April 15, 2012

day 45....had a little session last night...not in front of the mirror. Going strong today! :) I have like 4 assignments to do this week for therapy! i can do it! God is really blessing me lately...i get to travel to london this summer to perform! its expensive but worth it! :D
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April 16, 2012

day 46...i picked when i got home but i stopped! so good...but i needed to vent to my best friend and i did...felt good after!
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April 17, 2012

day 47...no pick monday!!
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April 19, 2012

day 48...tuesday went well day 49 wednesday was bad...but not too bad... ugh
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April 20, 2012

day 50 going strong
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April 20, 2012

Nice to hear about your commitment, I think I will start from today also... I've been picking my face since I was 13, I am 24 now and only just started to slowly stop picking my face and I have seen a major improvement on my skin. I hadn't picked my face for two weeks until last night :( ....my skin was sooo clear and I was extremely happy, but last night I was home alone and just got bored and started picking my face to the point where I've actually cut my forehead and its bothering me that I did this. Yesterday my face was completely free from scabs and scars, now I must start again!!... Top tip for you: It may be quite a hassle but I have found that my skin clears up quickly by drinking 8 glasses of water a day and rubbing Sudocream all over my face before going to bed! It really works! Good luck toomuchpressure :)
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April 20, 2012

nice to hear you are joining us! I completely understand...I never thought i had a "problem" because that is the pattern i fell in to ... pick a whole lot in one session...let my skin clear up and do it again two weeks later. obviously i learned that was a whole big part of it! I wish you the utmost luck...if you are interested in therapy, i found this wonderful woman annette pasternak and she is helping immensely! I do phone therapy and she emails me things to do and what not...i really think it will be worth it in the end! And thank you for a tip! I will deff try that! :)
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April 22, 2012

day 51...man i was doing so well! i didn't break too bad...but i did :(
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April 23, 2012

day 52...only picked 3! woot! :)
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April 24, 2012

day 53...did well today! got antsy but stopped myself :)
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April 25, 2012

its going well! Are you noticing improvement in your skin? are you feeling more relaxed and having less urges to pick now? taking it day by day is a good strategy.
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April 25, 2012

I am noticing improvement! It's really hard you know...I am still getting really antsy when I don't "relieve" myself with a huge session. The urges are still there but when I ignore them and focus on something else...it works! Thank you for commenting! :)
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April 26, 2012

day 54...just did some homework from my therapy session...having another one tomorrow really excited! I made the choice to not go to london this summer so i could really focus on myself after my current show is over...Im super excited for penn state this year and i cannot wait to start my new life! I was super antsy this afternoon...i woke up around 2pm haha silly me. I needed it...anyways i scratched a few but then washed my face and came to starbucks to do some work. I feel like sometimes i can concentrate more when I'm not at home. It works! best wishes for everyone here! :) Keep on keeping on! we can do this!
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April 26, 2012

day 55. just had therapy session...went well! i made lots of progress but I have to keep moving forward! :)
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April 27, 2012

day 56...feeling antsy today...trying to not touch my face and control it!
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April 28, 2012

day 56...cont. Today actually went well! i didn't pick earlier in the day and then when i came home i literally picked two minutes or less. it was great! i scanned my face violently with my hands and then i controlled the urge. was kind of weird not gonna lie but i did it! YEEE! :) here i go...gotta stay strong!
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April 28, 2012

day 57...wow how time has gone by so fast. I cannot believe tonight is closing night of my show and I am going to finally be free! don't get me wrong, it has been such a blessing to work on this show and to work with the cast and crew but i am so excited to have time for myself and to really make that commitment! i just bought a swimsuit yesterday and I cannot wait to work out and show off my pick free skin and toned muscles...hopefully! :)
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April 29, 2012

cont...i controlled the urge! only picked for five small minutes and probably a total of 6 spots! yaay!

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