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greenmachine , 03 Jul 2012

Why do I pick?

It's really hard for me to start this topic because I rarely share this problem even with my closest friends and family. I've been picking for 15 years and am now 23 years old. It's time for me to kick this habit. I'm ready for change and I know I can do it. It's hard to get rid of bad habits that you've had most of your life. Picking can be compared to someone with a smoking addiction. I know the triggers now and I even know how to stop, but what baffles me is why? Why do I do it? I'm now in a serious relationship with my boyfriend and he offers me support and in the beginning I made so much progress. I shared my problem with him and a conscious effort to stop by taking down the mirror. And for 2 months I had a clear face (I still had cuts on my legs) and was able to wake up in the morning and go to work without make up. I felt strong and more confident. Now, I just moved into a new apartment and any kind of stressful transition in my life increases my anxiety and stress levels and the picking gets worse and I suffer as a result, but there is no need to suffer. My boyfriend asked me why do I pick? I avoided the question and asked another question. I just don't know why I pick and this frustrates me more than anything else, but isn't it also important to stop rather than worry about the why.
4 Answers
July 03, 2012
I was wondering the same question about myself and I was talking to my dad the other day and he told me something that's so obvious. It's a very easy way to escape the stress. The minute I start picking the worries of the world are gone (I'm a stress picker too). So we are dealing with our stress by picking since it's such an easy escape. I used to yell when I got upset (I come from a family of yellers), but recently I decided I needed to stop yelling and crying when I get stressed and be more calm and I think I subconsciously started to pick as a substitute to yelling when I get stressed. So I still need to find something that's a good substitute for my stress.
July 12, 2012

In reply to by Arobda

I'd rather yell and cry then hurt myself. I've just started therapy and am now realizing that I have a difficult time sitting in my emotions. I like to think of myself as very evolved and self-aware, but I think I've been stepping over some sort of emotion since I started picking in junior high school. Now, instead of being able to feel the pain or angst of a moment, I hurt myself by picking, peeling, or wasting money. The older I've gotten, I just keep adding addictions, not getting over them, because I've been avoiding the real issues, which is just sitting and allowing the emotions to have their healthy way with me. Who said that yelling and crying were bad?
July 12, 2012
I've always picked my sores or acne. I'm a grown woman now and come to terms with it. I just had a break up of a 9 year relationship (my first real relationship.) I've started to pick and shave the bottom of my feet. I Googled this because I remember right before this relationship started was the only other time that I picked the bottom of my feet like this. I'd love to know what the significance of my doing this is, especially at such dynamic shifts in my life.

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