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frustrated and upset
Im a female in my 30s. Since I was little Id always pick at myself. I remember the place I used to pick all the time was my ear lobes and I blamed it on ear rings making my ears itch. That was at about age 6. Anyway I stopped for a long time. After I had my first child, I started picking again. On my scalp. I guess the past isnt very important ATM. Lately Ive been picking at my scalp a bit, but mainly on my ears. The upper part not the inner ear. Sometimes if I cant get a grip on the scab/dry skin, I will use a straight pin and place it under the scab but not far enough to make it bleed and pull up. It usually cuts it in half and I can grab an edge and pull. I try hard to make it so it doesnt bleed and if I feel any wetness, I can stop for a little while. Last night when I went to sleep, it was smooth despite the open wound. I woke up this AM and I was hurting and it felt crusty and I put off picking for a couple hours. Sadly all day long I have been picking. Ive used a pin 3 times per ear. Not bleeding or leaking pus, but I also cant grab an edge and pull it off. I am getting highly frustrated. Then I think about how gross this is and I just get mad. I have noticed I do this when Im tired, stressed or dont feel like I have control of a situation. I try and fix it but its hard and Im nervous to go see someone about it. There have been times Ive stopped mainly b/c my then BF and I lived together and I didnt want him to know about it. Im not really looking for advice, but I guess I kind of am. I just needed to vent and get my frustrations out. I hope eevryone else can find a way to stop their picking.
July 20, 2012
I believe skin picking and anxiety disorders are very much related. Acknowledgment of your behavior is the first step so pat yourself on the back! If I were you, I would start keeping a journal everyday whether or not you feel an urge to pick. Keep record of how your feeling emotionally and physically. It's very likely that you may be suffering from an anxiety disorder in which case, there are many mental health professionals trained to help people with destructive behavior like skin picking through cognitive behavioral therapy. Acknowledging that you have an issue, and making the choice to address it, will set you free! When you need help, ASK FOR IT! In my opinion, asking for help is the SMARTEST and BRAVEST thing you can do for yourself! Good luck to you.