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The new semester just started and I had promised myself that I was going to take better care of my body and skin so I could be more confident at school. I had gone 3 weeks without picking and my skin was looking great! It was tan and clean and I was so proud of myself for being able to keep my hands off of it for so long. Well that all crashed and burned tonight. As I was watching TV I could feel the pain of a small zit on my forehead. I felt it with my fingers and it was a pretty decent size. Something inside of me took over. It didn't even occur to me to say to myself, "Hey you've been looking and feeling great. Don't pick! We've been down this road before and you always look terrible for days after!" Instead I just walked to the bathroom with determination, got right up into the mirror, and not only popped that zit, but everything else on my face. It's like I was a zombie. A reasonable person would know that it's bad, but that part of my brain just seems to shut down! So now it is red and bumpy, and I even left a large sore on my forehead that is definitely going to scab. I am so disappointed in myself. I do this over and over. I probably won't go to school for the rest of the week because it is THAT bad. This is really disappointing to me that a habit like picking my face is starting to interfere so much in my life. I haven't picked like this in a really long time. It's like all of the holding back made it that much worse when the floodgates finally opened again. The silver lining in all of this is that I was so fed up with what I had just done that I googled "skin picking compulsive" and found this site and others. It turns out that i'm not the only one! I had no idea that other people had this same problem, and that it's a real disorder. I also pick at my cuticles, chew my nails, pick at my toenails until they bleed, and pull the dry skin off my foot until it's raw. Apparently these are all somewhat related! Now that I have made the connection and know it is a real psychological problem that other people suffer from, I feel like I can finally break these habits once and for all. Knowing that my nasty habits are all related I can try and find the root of the problem. I am very healthy and 22 years old so I am lucky enough to have skin that heals quickly. If I am going to conquer this once and for all, it needs to happen now before I no longer have that luxury. Thanks for this website. I feel like writing all of this has helped me take the first step in kicking this habit's ass!