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ams041102 , 17 Sep 2012

fingers, lips, and hurts

It started with my lips when I was about 7 or 8 years old. then it went to my fingers. then the bottoms of my feet. I am now 30 years old and mutilated. The feeling during the time I'm doing this feels awesome and gratifying then when I stop I'm left bleeding and covered in sores. Not only is it embarrassing but it's painful. I have no cuticles and the pads of my fingers are full of sores as I type. I think the weirdest part of it all is that I eat the skin when I'm finished. No one knows this part...except you now I guess. I love to swim during the summer but I have to be sure that no one sees the bottoms of my feet that are alien like when wet. A few years ago I promised my husband that I would quit, since I could quit smoking it should be easy, right? nope..broke that promise. Now my 10 year old daughter rips at her lips constantly and I just hope the cycle isn't going to fully repeat.

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