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stacie03 , 15 Feb 2013

healing :)

hi i just want to start off by saying a BIG thank you to the person who created this site. and for everyones posts. it truely is amazing how theres a site like this where u can find help and advise and also u dont feel alone its been a big comfort too me coming on here reading everyones experiences. its not something u can just speak to your mates about and most people wouldnt understand. i had been picking for 4 years. every day id find myself going to the bathroom mirror. what id do is squeeze so hard at a spot and make it so bad id bruise the skin then it would scab up. and i take to it with the tweezers pulling my skin off until it was red raw and it would bleed. my face never healed every chance i had forbit to scab and heal id get my tweezers back out. it had now become my habbit every chance i got on my own even in a dark room without a mirror id so do it because i was used to doing it. my face looked a mess. felt so good doing it sort of went in a trance doing it. it become my every day routine. i used to hide away from the people i loved. pushing everyone away my boyfriend my family. i became a let down to my friends cayse i used to plan things and never went cause of the mess my face was in. it stoped me from doing so many things swimming just having fun. used to hate the sun because that showed my skin up more wih makeup capped on to cover up the round massive.scabs on my face which id created my self. i have a 3 year old daughter. and one day she seen me without my make and she said to me ' mummy your face scares me' have some medicine 'calpol' and it will make it better and u will smile again. this itself made me realise. what am i doing! i have gone without picking and its all because of my daughter making me realise mummy does look scary without make up and i had done this to my now im on the mend i have scars but im going to clear them up with treatments! first thing i did was take my mirror down in the bathroom and removed my tweezers out of the bathroom. every time i think about doing it i remember what she said too me.. its a mind thing beat the habbit dont let it beat you :) love to you all x

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