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can't stop this shame
So wow. I am amazed at my own shamefulness. Here i am sitting at my desk picking at my hands that I spent over a hour picking at on saturday. I want to cry. I am too disgusting to even go to church tonight. I'm so embarrased. But why can't i stop. Everywhere i see them. little blackheads, bubbles things i can pop, back, arms, fingers, legs, boobs and privates, stomach. face. even can feel some under my hair that i have messed with. I'm compulsive to every extent of the word and i am so disgusting. Not only on top of this cumpulsive disorder, im annorexic and bulimic, suffer from depression, OCD, generalized anxiety disorder and bipolar. I'm a frigging mess. I read about calamine lotion so im gonna try that, and the whole dont look theory. Gonna try my best. Everyday is a new day. thats what i keep saying right? Tioday was supposed to be day 1 no picking, that lasted oh like 10 min. And my hubby thinks that i am thinking about something to trigger it, but i feel like its just a habit that i can't stop. Any thoughts? I need to get this figured out, im so scared i will jsut tear my skin apart until its gone.
In reply to I am starting to realise by sm123