Picking at my lips

Nadine, journaling about your compulsion can help you get out the feelings about it and help you release some of the anxiety. I've discovered I pick my skin or engage in other compulsive behaviors to get away from something I'm thinking or feeling or not dealing with. Talking to someone who may share the compulsion (or any compulsion for that matter) can help. You can even talk to yourself out loud, which for some reason is easier than writing sometimes. For example, the last time I picked, I was in my car and I said "Stop. What is going on right now?" I realized my anxiety was stemming from my running late for lunch with my brother, and feeling guilty for making him wait. I asked myself: will he love me any less if I'm 10 minutes late? Obviously not. So what's really under my skin right now? As I kept talking to myself, I realized the real reason I was anxious was that there was a family issue we'd been putting off talking about for months and we were finally going to talk about it. I was terrified. I had to slow down, breathe, and say the truth out loud. I had to hear it. We ended up having a really pleasant lunch, talking about said family issue and catching up about life in general. It helped I had already prepped myself in the car, so I could keep the conversation light and not stuff my feelings or, worse, keep putting off the conversation. Sometimes just becoming aware of your feelings before/after your picking can be super helpful. In the last 10 months or so, I've started working with a therapist and self-help groups on a lot of my issues, namely childhood traumas, and have found that it's been a lot easier to deal with compulsive behaviors i've resorted to for 10-15 years. Good luck. You are not alone. Rosa