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wiccanprincess35 , 09 Mar 2009

I enjoy the smell and taste of the blood and plasma when I pick my scabs

this is disgusting, but hey, I see everyone is being honest here. I honestly have been a picker since I can remember as a small child. When I was a child I used to get made fun of by other classmates because my legs always had open bloody sores all over them. My dad even tried making wear gloves and nylons to get me to stop, and now here I am 35, still picking as much if not more. I am diagnosed with anxiety/panic disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, and depression. I have been on 40mg of Prozac for and Klonipin for over a year now and it has not helped at all with my OCD of picking my scabs off. Ever since I was little, I also eat the scabs. I can't describe it, its like some kind of urge I get to pick of the scab, and I get some kind of satisfaction and enjoyment out of the feeling of picking the scab off and then chewing it and swallowing it. I always thought I was crazy and weird and maybe a vampire in a previous life time. I also love sucking the blood, after I pick the scab, the taste of the blood, and then my favorite part is when the blood stops and there is only plasma coming out. I love the smell of the plasma and rub it all over my lips. Then I am almost obsessed and keep smelling the wound for the smell of plasma. I am not proud to admit I have this mental disorder, but i guess hiding behind a computer screen makes it easier to talk about. I tell my psychiatrist about it and his reply is lets just raise my dosage of Prozac. I always thought I was mentally disturbed and enjoyed hurting myself, but Now I found this website and I am glad to know I am not the only one who suffers from this condition and there is an actual name for it. The consequences I have had from picking over my lifetime: When I was about 7 or 8 blood poisoning going up my leg, could have killed me, when I was a kid, got impatago, and as an adult, have acquired, staff infections from the picking. My picking has driven my parents crazy all of my life and now my boyfriend thinks its so gross, but no matter what I do, I can't stop. Thank you for letting me share my story.
12 Answers
wiccanprincess35
March 09, 2009
I also forgot to add, I get enjoyment and satisfaction out of watching the blood run down my leg or arm, wherever, the wound may be that I picked off the scab. I really need mental help. Am I the only one that has these disturbing obsessions relating to skin picking disorder?
SweetDeeDee
March 09, 2009

In reply to by wiccanprincess35

Well, you might have a CSP (that's means Compulsive Skin Picking). I have the same as you too but I always looks at bloods of my arms to see what it's look like down there but I wouldn't even like it very much! I try to put the cream on to cover up but I'm made it almost but I slip-up a little bit but it's getting there. Well, did you have a cream like to puts on your scabs or other bloods flows on your arms/legs? I used my polysportin cream to heal faster on my wounds. Wow, they saw your legs in your school? mine was my best friend saw it and she also told me what this? I told her a flybites which was lying to her then she told me don't pick and I says ok but she knows! Alt least, she doesn't know when I starting picking ever since I was 9 years old. My parents don't know about me yet but my mom caught me in a few times while I was growing up. Does your classmates think your bad? I wouldn't say that your a bad peson who does this problem of yours. Your are a good person that comes from a positvie things like I do too. Plus, Your not alone and we are here for your help and get through this process. I think you should see your family doctor about your problem first then see what the doctor say about it.
pumpky1107
April 04, 2009

In reply to by wiccanprincess35

Not at all. I am so there with you. I feel like a prisoner of my own making. I do the same thing with the scabs, blood and plasma. Hard to admit as i am repulsed by my own self! hang in there! I just bought the 12 weeks of online counseling for this. Am praying it helps me.
mamma
May 28, 2009

In reply to by pumpky1107

please keep me updated on how the online counseling goes. I need help and I have been on medication and tried therapy but nothing has helped so far. The only thing that has really helped is when I started writing and reading on this forum.
misty
April 08, 2009
I'm new here. I finally found out last year that there was a name for what I did to my self. CSP... I have been doing it as far back as I can remember. I not only pick and pop , I eat and lick the blood and when I pop I eat that too. very sick but I can STOP. I pick every were on my body their is no safe place. It has got worse I dont just pick the scab but rip chuncks of skin to,it feels so good at the time, pulling off the scab. I have sorse that last for months and resently my scares are re-opening. I have done the drugs and therpy, were long cloths all the time and I might go a day with out picking but then that night I will pick every thing on my body till I have blood running every were and I can hardly move cuz it hurts sooo bad. People are always asking about the sores and scares and I always would say bug bits. I KNOW why I do it,growing up was hard in my messed up family. I NEED HELP but dont know what to do. Maybe talking to someone else thats in the same boat as me will help I dont know. feeling hopeless :(
NikB
May 27, 2009
Well, don't feel alone! I am actually picking & eating as I am on here. : ( I do not understand my desire to eat the skin & scabs that I pick off of myself. And the blood! I love how it tastes, I am totally off my rocker! It is even hard for me to have blood drawn, because I don't want them to have it. I just want to grab it out of their hands. WEIRD. But, I am hoping that by being on this forum that I will get advice from people who are winning the battle with this disorder. I have even gone as far as buying a lancet and poking my fingers to get the blood. I feel like a complete wacko...
detailsofnothing
June 02, 2009
You are definitely not alone. I have been picking my skin for probably about 13 years (im 23 now) but only recently have I realized how much I love the smell of blood and, I guess, its plasma... its not the same scent as blood but it happens especially when I pick my face. I have never wanted to eat scabs, so I conside rmyself lucky but I often wonder how much skin i have picked off of my body, mow many times all the skin would cover my body or my face. I am currently seeing a renowned behavioral therapist who specializes in OCD, I have made some progress and I have knowledge of more strategies and more awareness of how my mind is working and how I am basically addicted to this cycle of picking. The most important thing I have learned is to NOT START when you feel yourself scanning/feeling your skin. once you start, like other addictions, its next to impossible to make yourself stop. breaking the mind/body feedback cycle is really important, our brains crave the touching, the smell, its a negative way to cope with what we deal with. I wanted to tell you, 40 mg of prozac might not be enough. what are you on now? I used to be on prozac, switched to cymbalta and i love it. it helps more with my anxiety and physical symptoms (pain, sleeping, etc) I would STRONGLY advise you to see someone besides just a psychiatrist. they will mostly focus on medical solutions, rather than mind/body, cognitive, psychotherapeutic solutions which I feel most skin pickers desperately need. I cannot say my picking is cured, but my overall life is really improving and I feel more empowered. Now it is a matter of pushing myself to follow through with the tools i have at my disposal and USE the techniques I have learned. btw... I used to have an eating disorder, which I have overcome. It was the hardest thing I have EVER done in my life. My therapist has said to me that overcoming skin picking my be even MORE DIFFICULT which seems ridiculous to me, but maybe he is right.... kind of depressing but I think we have all been picking for so long it is impossible to think we will turn over years and years of ingrained behavior in a few months. Hang in there
espanolablue
July 16, 2010
espanolablue hello im espanolablue im 38 yrs old . me too i been pick my skin off for 35 yrs since i was 5 yrs old. it's so much damage the colors of my skin. it's not a scar tho. cuz i look at my fingers it is ocd that you have just like me so I dont know how to stop doing it. cuz I think i shuld get help cuz im too anxiety worry angry sad crying all that make me want pick my skin fingers and eating skin and scab too only it's drying out mostly i always rip my skin off so badly it's keep blood i do suckin my blood all the times and i dont know why and i do think about it i just keep do it for so many yrs from now. it's sad i know.. yea it is very seriously i have. i always hide from them sometimes i put band it on it all of my fingers i dont pick thumb skin very rarely most of skin is front of my skin fingers not skin bottom for 35 yrs sometimes i do pick my skin lip or feets very rarely and most are my skin fingers all the times.. my ex fiance or my family tried to tell me to stop and i can't stop cuz I'm nervous breakdown a lot there is no way make stop it. becuz it's been too many years ever since i was 5. but i need some help cuz i dont know how to stop. . I've been feel like a trap when i get stress out like that. cuz that something control over me.. it is too damn hard! it's scary for me. tho. i always end up bleed for like 4 mintues then stop cuz i suck my blood up and put alcohol pads on my fingers oh boy it's hurt like hell too many times.
espanolablue
July 16, 2010
i just wanna to know where i get the idea to pick my skin fingers come from that is so mistery for real :|
Converses09
July 26, 2010
Same here. I pick and eat the scabs. I lick the blood and sometimes I only pick the scabs where I can see the plasma cause those are the best ones, and they don't leave blood stains on my clothes. I have never realized that there were people like me either. I wish there was a better way to end it all than just having everyone here saying "yeah me too!" I can't stand my pictures anymore. It's bad enough that I'm a little overweight, but to wear concealer everyday and make it worse? to be unable to take candid pictures because there's always red dots all over me. I'm 21 now, and have been doing this since I was a very young child. Has anyone here bought the book? Has it helped them in any way at all?
BWKPICKER
October 31, 2012
I've been in the same boat...my husband asks me everyday why my arms are so scabbed up! And I can't answer!! Really had me worried till I went online and saw how many people had the same symptoms and what they were diagnosed with!!! At least now I can put a name to what i am doing to myself!! Just want to find a cure to it!!!

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