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littlewhit , 04 Aug 2013

how can i fight this monster?

I found this forum while trying to find help for my girlfriend. She spends hours in the mirror picking at her face, she thinks she is picking acne but there is nothing there and she is just ruining her beautiful skin! It really drives me crazy and is causing a strain on our relationship. I am at my wits end! We don't know how to treat this dermatillomania disorder. Does anyone have any recommendations on any medication we can use or facewashes? Does neosporin help? Will these scars from scabs on her legs and back ever go away? I don't know where else to turn. I beg and beg her to stop picking her beautiful skin and get out of the bathroom but she just ignores me. This in turn drives me crazy. I have to leave the room or else I will lose my temper because of the way she just ignores me.
5 Answers
August 05, 2013
I'm relieved you actually realize she actually has a problem and needs help. Most people just think it's a gross habit. I've tried Neosporin, Vaseline, and an oil I bought at Sephora, and a lot more. They all have varying degrees of success, but they all seem to be better than nothing. If nothing else, I rinse with cold water. It's nearly impossible to stop fresh scabs from forming though. And when you ask her to stop and she ignores you, it is because she can't help it and feels compelled to continue. Chances are she really wants to stop, but honestly can't.
August 06, 2013
honey helps heal a lot because it pushes out impurties on the skin and makes it new again. vasline helps a lot to it makes you break out , but its the the fresh pimples that pop easily and go away and its better than huge scabs right ? iv done this problem since i was a baby about 2 or 3 and im 21 and i still struggle just as bad with it ... the honey and vasline is what has helped heal the most i believe.. trying to count and talk to yourself before you start helps some to , but you also need a lot of willpower.
August 07, 2013
I have a horrible picking problem, I have many other problems too but my picking is out of control. As far as the scars go have her try Mederma Scar Gel, it's worked great on the scars I have already. I was so bad I would lock myself in the bathroom and try and pop those little bumps you get around your areola, well the ones us women get. I got so scarred I was so ashamed. But the problem is that unless someone wants to stop they won't. If they have to hide to do it they will. And even if you can't see any imperfections on her skin she is seeing them. I would sit with tweezers and pull things out of the hair follicles of my legs, lady area, and spend hours intensely trying to get blackheads out. It is a real problem, and I still do it without realizing it, when I'm laying in bed I'll just search my body for any bump I can pop or scratch. I hope she wants to get help, best of luck to you!
August 07, 2013
I do exactly the same. I find using the rubber band method helps. If your girlfriend is willing to try it tell her to keep an elastic band around her wrist. Any time she goes to pick her face make her snap the elastic band and gives her a tiny sting. This way she gets distracted and it trains her brain to expect pain when she's going to pick, making her less likely to feel tempted. Let me know if this helped or if you have tried it before. :)
August 09, 2013
Have you tried sitting down with her and having a conversation about it at a time when she's not stressed or anxious or hasn't recently picked. My boyfriend did that with me a few months ago and I found it really increased my desire to stop. He explained what his fears were around it and listened and talked through my whole life experience of it. It made him realise just how difficult it is for me to stop and how insidious a thing it is. What was useful for me was knowing he still thought I was beautiful even when I have the angry red scars after picking that he was just dissapointed and upset that I would do that to myself. He aknowledges how hard it will be but also shows he feels I have the strength to do it. After having that talk I realised its not just my private thing, it affects him too. So if I've locked myself in the bathroom for too long he'll now knock if he notices I've been in there too quietly for too long and I get a rush of guilt for doing that to him and I'll stop. We're in it together and even though it hasn't fully made me stop its enough that I do it less and sometimes pull away just before I'm about to.

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