If this is a disease, it must be genetic

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January 23, 2017

It seems to be genetic. My brother also picks his skin, but he mainly focuses on upper arms and back, while I pick my face 99% of the time. He also experiences anxiety and OCD, which have been a struggle for me all my life. I do not eat my scabs, I like to peel them off because it gives me a sense of control over my body. And the cognitive confusion I experience is in thinking that by picking off the scabs I am somehow helping my body in its healing process. Maybe my mind has created that concept to allow itself to keep up this skin picking addiction. I just wish that I would register it as being unhealthy and BAD...yet my mind seems to want to constantly rationalize it and I find myself acting like an addict. Ill be at the mirror arguing with my impulse, eventually being pulled under its spell by duping myself into believing that this will be "the last time" that I pick. Its silly and its never the last time. I am sure that drug addicts also often say that it will be their last time taking a drug, I certainly understand the strong compulsive tendencies. And then my mind tries to rationalize by telling itself...well at least I'm not a drug addict (in hopes of making itself feel better). This problem seems to be just as bad though because it alienates me from people and often causes me to be a shut in.