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Usually, I start by fixating on one single spot or bump (doesn’t even have to be a blemish-- it could even be a scar from previous picking in that spot). I try to restrain myself from picking at it for a while. After a few minutes it becomes unbearable and I can’t control myself anymore; I justify picking at the spot to myself by promising that I’ll “just do this one and after that I’ll stop”. After the first spot, I quickly move on to another one, this time justifying it by telling myself that I’ll “just do it for a couple minutes”. I move from spot to spot rapidly after this, trying to get as much picking in before my bullshit “end time” as I can. What happens after this I’m not totally sure of but I know that everything starts to fade out and get hazy. I snap out of it at a certain point; when I check the time I usually find that I’ve been picking for one and upwards of two hours. After that, even when I’m going about my day, I can’t refrain from picking even as I’m fully coherent. Long sleeves don’t help very much because when I pick, I “see” with my hands by running the pads of my fingertips over wherever it is that I am picking at the time.
My parents love me and support me, they pay for me to go to CBT and all that; however they simply don't have any desire to believe that skin picking is a real disorder that exists, just because they think its not a "normal" mental disorder to have. I guess I joined today because I need to feel heard and like someone believes me.