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Hi, Its taken me a lot of time to get up the courage to post this. I have taken lots of pictures of my nose but can't find how to upload them onto here.
So basically I told my family and friends I fell off my bicycle and hit my nose on the floor. Here's the truth... Roughly 4 years ago I became obsessed with removing blackheads from my nose. I would do it daily and stupidly I used a really bad technique of just using my bare fingers to violently squeeze the skin on my nose to try and get them out. Right in the middle of my nose there was what appeared to be a large blackhead (now i'm not so sure it even was a blackhead). I squeezed and squeezed and couldn't get it out and this basically went on obsessively for a whole weekend. By the end of it my nose was huge (swollen) and really painful. I ended up with a bloody, sore, red raw nose and the 'blackhead' was still there. I then proceeded to stab it with a sterilised needle and squeeze it so hard my hands got cramp. I basically performed a small operation on my nose in my bathroom over the course of a weekend. The next day when I woke up and looked in the mirror... I just cried and cried at what I had done to my face. I had made myself look like a monster, and for what? I was and still am absolutely devastated every time I look in the mirror, it just reminds me of what an idiot I am and how ugly I've made myself. This was 4 years ago and I haven't had a girlfriend since, people cross the street when I am walking towards them. I'm a friendly guy but now I look like a deformed thug and people just don't want to know me. I work full time and have a public facing role in a shop, people always ask what happened to my nose and I just feel a deep sense of shame and guilt. I have spoken to my family about the dent (they still think it was an accident) and they pretend they can't see it. Literally they say I don't know what you're talking about which just infuriates me because they are fooling noone!!!
After the incident it scabbed over and I made a conscious effort to not touch it, let it heal, praying there wouldn't be a dent, but there is a massive dent.
The only good I can tell you from this whole thing is that now I don't do this to myself anymore because I have found the correct techniques for removing blackheads (blackhead scrubs, clean and clear blackhead remover, squeezing and rolling the skin lightly with tissue instead of just the bare finger)
What I am here for is advice on what I can do to repair this dent. What options do I have?
Would a filler work on this or would I need some sort of operation?
I'm at the point where i'm ready to smash/slash my nose up and go to hospital in the hope they fix it for me. I'm at my wits end and I feel like this is only going to get worse over time.
Any input is welcome, please just give me some advice if you have been through similar or know what procedure could help fix this.
Thank you so much