It would be a godsend to receive a sincere reply to this... (Warning: severe Dermatillomania at play here...)
Okay, well... after years, no, almost two decades of constant and hardly disrupted dermatilomania, accompanied with dangerous extraction tools such as of needles, tweezers, and mirrors--throwing them away and then ultimately repurchasing them months later... I have no doubt created permanent damage to my skin, and the biggest problem, (and the greatest reason why I have such a hard time quieting the behavior), is that almost EVERY time I pick, no matter how much acne I extract, (sometimes squeezing as hard as I physically can...), it just hardly ever works in the long term...
No matter how good or a thorough job I think I do, I guess there is always some residual acne, bacteria left behind, no doubt from pushing the acne deeper and wider. Then, in the aftermath, a noticeable skin lesion, scab forms over the picked area that takes a few days to naturally heal and eventually fall off. Of course, the new skin usually has some initial discoloration and texture differences, or slight inflammation: appearance of acne... Which almost always creates the super intense need to pick at that spot again, and again... It's a horrible cycle.
So, my unsatisfying theory... After a focused picking session, which results in a scab that eventually falls off--you know that new skin that forms? It just doesn't seem the same... Are there any pores, hair follicles? If leftover acne is present, which is now pooled or cystic under a scared tissue, is there any natural way for that acne to surface? Sometimes I can leave it alone, but over a few weeks it just seems to manifest under the new skin, creating somewhat of a bump or 3D effect, which I sharply conclude is puss or nodular acne, which makes me almost always lose control and begin scanning, squeezing, and picking at it... Unsatisfied with the results, I will often repurchase more of those tools I mentioned... Sometimes, individual pools up puss force their way through the healing skin, or sometime the head of an acne node become present after some picking, opening, which is almost only able to be extracted with the help of tweezers ... Hence, more scars... More acne... More picking... The cycle never seems to end......
So, my question: Does anybody have a solution to this? Scared skin and the acne underneath it? Is the unsatisfying answer simply just: you did it, now just live with?
Thank you much,