i am a 39 year old male. i turn 40 in june and my fantasy is to have face picking behind me by my birthday.
i have been picking since i was around 12 years old. my mother used to pick at my pimples with a sterilized needle ( she did the same to my siblings) and i believe she in effect trained us to pick at ourselves.
although in recent years my picking has gotten better, i still do it ( i just did about an hour ago)
i thought that i had discovered the key to not picking by not allowing myself to get too close to the mirror, especially at night. i have a few clogged pores and sometimes very small blemishes, but nothing that someone without this disorder would ever notice.
i'm feeling so discouraged right now because this episode came out of nowhere. i was planning on going to a friend's birthday party tonight but now i'm staying home because of the damage i've done.
it starts with me examining my face very closely and if i notice even the slightest bump, i try to force the contents out. i create 5 or 6 red bumps all over my face and then i force myself to stop and i hold ice on the swelling. i have concealer everywhere; in my gym bag, my coat, my medicine cabinet. if i'm not worrying that people can see my blemishes, i'm worried that they're noticing that i have makeup on.
i am so tired of this. i actually get compliments on my skin all the time, and my face was clear when i woke up this morning. i really, really would like to put this behind me.
is it possible to beat this thing?
any feedback would be appreciated. i'm so glad i found this website.