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anonymous20 , 08 Nov 2009

Here's my story...

Hi everybody! I can't believe I found this site. I never really realized I had a true problem up until a few days ago, and well its so relieving to here that there are actually others out there like me. When I was in my early teens, I had beautiful, clear skin that many of my friends were envious us. It wasn't until my whole life turned upside down, and I moved to a very strange, isolated place, lost all my friends and everything I knew, and started to suffer major loneliness and depression. My skin started breaking out (due to stress I assume) and that's when the picking began. This is when I was 16. I am now 20. My picking has been on and off for that time period. When I am really happy, my skin is wonderful and clear! Even when I have my period (and I tend to break out) it isn't so bad because I am not picking. But when I am sad, oh my, you do not want to see my face! I have become the master of applying makeup (which I wish I didn't have to wear!) Even tonight, I started to feel a little lonely, and depressed, and guess what? I went to the mirror and started making things worse!! But I stopped myself. I told myself, I can't destroy my face any longer... It makes you so depressed. I cannot tell you how I manage to have a job and go to college. It's hard. Sometimes you will avoid an event you really wanted to go to just so others do not have to see what you have done to your face! When I pick, it's like I can stop. Just one more...I will think. But as we all know, it's never just one more! And the truth it, you look for things. Things that are so small. Things that nobody could ever see! But the truth is, I am so happy to find others like me. I would love to make some friends on this post, just so we can support each other. Kind of like they do in AA. We all have to realize, it is in a sense an addiction. As I was reading earlier, it releases endorphines and that is why we feel that sense of relief when we pick! I have realized for quite sometime now that my skin picking is really a symptom of some much bigger issues that I suffer. I think this includes anxiety, depression, both of which run in my family. At the same time, I do believe everything happens for a reason. I think that everything I have experienced so far in my life has made me a more compassionate person...and my major goal in life is to help others! So, first I need to help myself. I think I truly have been in a sea of ignorance and denial up until this point! So, thanks for listening to me, and I'd love to know what you all think. Just writing this makes me feel a little better...
3 Answers
November 09, 2009
Being active on this forum helps me so much. Welcome by the way :) I am 31 and been a picker since age 6 or so. Don't be shy here...let it all out...that's what the forum is for. It's so liberating to have a place to confess to all the ugly shaming picking compulsions we have!
November 11, 2009
Hi i am new to this website as well... just like you, i suffer from this disease that until recently i thought was just a bad, uncontrollable, life ruining habit... I am also glad to know that i am not alone... i was so happy to learn what was wrong with me... suddenly everything seems so clear... i thank God for answering my prayers. I hope that all of us out there with this disorder overcome it, it can be done..and will be done with Gods help! :) may god bless you :)
November 11, 2009
Thank you for sharing your story here, everyones story is an inspiration to someone out there suffering from the same thing. I understand your story completely, and like you I'm looking for someone to be a supportive friend with in this battle to regain our sanity, and happiness. Your certainly not alone, and you will have support and encouragement as long as you continue to have hope and never give up on yourself. I have been picking my face for about 9 years now. I am an individual who constantly seeks perfection, in everything, especially myself. As everyone does I experienced a few minor breakouts as a young teen and insisted on squeezing and popping them immediately, of course causing damage beneath the surface and causing further breakouts. As time went on I began picking longer and deeper and more aggressively, and before I knew it I was inches from the mirror every night digging at every tiny pore. My skin became worse and worse and I started avoiding social events and school, even sports occasionally. Now, at 21 years old, I am unemployed, and hopeless. The future is something I dread because all I know for sure is my skin will most likely be as disgusting as ever. I can't imagine facing the next 10 years looking and feeling the way I do now. I, like you, realized recently that this may be a problem beyond my control, an addiction of sorts, and began searching for information and help. If you'd like, you can email me at, I'd really like to hear more about your story and your struggle with this addiction.

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