A memory


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January 08, 2010

how ghetto i cant edit my own post*
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January 15, 2010

yeah, this forum is pretty bare-bones. But I was going to say... I read your post (all of it!), and I know where you're coming from. Some people just can't help judging you, and even if they could help they wouldn't, and I HATE that. I know it can be especially hard with Asperger's but I'm really glad to see you've got some good friends... that's what's really important in getting through life if things are rough... Anyway, it's really great that the goth/rock chick was nice to you in the end... and yeah, you can say sometimes a person will make your DAY or whatever, but I think it's people like that who make your LIFE. I can remember people who've said things to me years ago that just touched me in a really great way. There are times when your'e nice to people and they're nice back to you, which is great, but other times it's people who can just tell that life is difficult but they understand or like you or feel you, just by looking at you, and then they say or do something really great that peps you up for a LONG time - not just a day. Anyway, I always try to go out of my way and be extra friendly/understanding to people now (who deserve it) since other people made such an impact on me in my life that way. Kind of a "pay it forward" thing. I can't afford to give people outrageously good tips or anything, but i try to chat longer or smile bigger or sort of... telepathically send "good vibes". I recommend you do this too, because I'm sure you're more understanding of other people who aren't perfect either.... Well, overall, sounds like you've got a pretty good head on your shoulders and I wish you the best. Good luck!
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October 19, 2010

I totally get what you mean about some rare times being able to see yourself for a moment, its such a strange moment, and iv reacted to it with very mixed emotions when its happened to me, like one of the times it happened i felt so sad that i couldnt always see it, but at the same time, kind of overwhelmed (i guess is the word?) that i was able to see it, its hard though to keep hold of the image in my head afterwards. Its happened to me a few times as i remember, but most of these times it was just for like a second, only very rare has it happened for a long enough time to take it in
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October 19, 2010

Yeah...I am always afraid people are going to think I'm on meth too because of how i destroy my face, and I can cover it with makeup. I know what you mean about the job thing. This is probably oversharing but when I lived in LA I was a bikini dancer. My face was pretty badly broken out (guys asked if I did meth), and my butt was a little too because the floor on the stage was always dirty. So I tried to keep my booty shorts on, but this one guy, who was wearing a yellow shirt, BEGGED me to take off the shorts so I'd just be in the thong (which is what we all wore there, no big deal). Finally he convinced me to (and a $20 bill later) so I did, and he says to me, "Can I bite the pimples off your ass?" I was SOOOO shocked,horrified, and embarrassed that I ran off stage and cried in the dressing room. People have NO IDEA how their comments can hurt. And the thing is, this guy was honestly trying to be...sexy...talking to me. God men can be so dumb sometimes!!! wendy