since it is so difficult a habit or compulsion to deal with i thought a place to celebrate achievements however small might be welcomed.
i woke today and took off my bandages and immediately scratched the scab off one of my sores. i admonished myself immediately about not even being able to make it one minute into the day without picking. then i decided to see how long i could go despite being alone for a good while yet. i tied back my hair and after a wipe with just water applied some jojoba oil to my face and neck. i have been successful so far for about four hours using mind over matter to resist the skin sensations that urge me to explore various spots. i have not bandaged back up, nor have i put on any makeup. i have not given my spots more than a quick visual and managed to not attack anywhere despite spots that would normally have gotten a bit at least. gloves are at the ready should sensations deem them to be advisable to wear. i won't be alone long, now, but hope i won't have need to step out into the world which would require the need for a makeup application.
oh the irony of healing being itchy!