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little-love , 27 Aug 2012

Face Picking Is RUINING MY LIFE!

Hello, OK, so where do I start..... I have been picking since I was around the age of 14 or 15, but as with a lot of you on here, I can't really pinpoint the exact moment when I started picking at my skin. I remember I would squeeze a spot if I got one, but somehow it developed into dermatillomania and now I squeeze at pores and anything else on my face until it is red, peeling and sore. One moment that sticks in my mind is when I went to my mum's house when I was about 14 and she looked in my ear and said 'You've got a blackhead'. and she squeezed it and got rid of it. I didn't even know what a blackhead was, but this alerted me to it and I then thought, they must be bad I need to get rid of them. So maybe this was the trigger...who knows??? Anyway, I have never been confident in myself and I feel like I am always on a constant search to change myself to make me the 'perfect' person (whatever that is...) I have always felt under pressure to to be a high achiever and to please either my dad or my teachers and a lot of people I know would describe me as 'perfect' but inside I feel the total opposite. I am now 19 and still pick at my face although, over the last year, my picking seems to have subsided slightly. I used to pick at my chest and squeeze the pores, but I rarely do that these days. Maybe that's because I have a boyfriend now who I want to look nice for-he tells me all the time how 'gorgeous' I am, but God I feel ugly. I HATE him seeing me with no make-up. He is the only one I have told about my dermatillomania and he is so supportive, but I want to be free from this!!! I am going into my second year of uni in september and I want to be able to to all my lessons, not miss them because of my face!!! I hated the course I was on last year and it was really stressfull and I picked at my face and missed lessons for it. I don't want it to happen again. What techniques or advice do people have to stop me picking?? Thanks xxx
5 Answers
Kitcat
August 27, 2012
Umm I really don't have a lot of advice, I just try to keep myself busy. Do you have acryllic nails? When I had them I found it very difficult to pick and scratch b/c the ends were so blunt and it reduced the sensation of the bumps on my skin, what I could not feel I did not pick, and the time that I had them on it made a marked difference. I'm not talking freaky long nails, but just conservative, finger tip length, and then file them down on the ends so they're flat. I serioulsy could not lift scabs, or skin flakes, or draw blood when scratching. I even cut back on squezing b/c I could not feel the bumps as easily or be triggered to pick b/c of the thickness and the sensation is altered.
little-love
August 27, 2012

In reply to by Kitcat

I don't have acrylic nails, I do a lot of art and stuff so they would get ruined easily I think :S I do find if I keep myself busy I pick less, but something always triggers me to go and look in the mirror!! I have heard that it takes 30 days to make a habit, so this is why I think I don't pick at my chest anymore-I somehow managed not to do it for so long that I no longer think about it, but its not so easy with my face as it's always on show, so I am always thinking about it.
Kitcat
August 27, 2012

In reply to by little-love

I hear you about the art stuff. I find myself constantly feeling for bumps or abberations on my skin, is this perhaps what's triggering you? Mine is I "itch" and therefore go looking for something to scratch, but I am constantly roaming any of my exposed skin for something to pick at.. I know that having completely clipped nails for a lady is not really ideal, but it does help, about the squeezing though, I have rules and limits I impose on myself, sounds sort of like you do too. Good job on not picking at your chest any more, it, my neck, scalp and back are my hot spots.
little-love
August 27, 2012

In reply to by Kitcat

I guess I am always touching my face and feeling around even when I don't have any spots, because when my skin is clear I live in irrational fear that I will be out and a massive spot will pop up, so by checking my face constantly, it reassures me that there is nothing there, but it also works against me because I touch my face and then find the tiniest thing and I want to pick to prevent a spot appearing but it ends up causing a spot and arghhhh its just one big cycle that I need to break. I KNOW i can go for a few weeks without picking because I have done it in the past and battling my chest picking also gives me hop that one day I can defeat my face picking too.
Rachel04
August 27, 2012

In reply to by little-love

this feeling is all too familiar. i feel frustrated thinking i can't "just live my life like everyone else" until i remind myself that everyone has a story. I may think someone has the perfect life and they could be dealing with something just as difficult. anyway, this post just sparked that thought. hope today was a good day for you.

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