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OBSESSED4 , 10 Apr 2014

My Acne And Acne Scars Are Ruining My Life!!!!!

Hello. I have had acne since I was 8 (I'm 13 now). Ever since I was 10, it has gotten worse and I started to pick at it. I HATE going places with my family and friends because they might say something like, "You have a big pimple right there" or "I remember when your skin used to be so smooth and beautiful" and they just don't know how much that hurts me :( When they say stuff like that i become really self-conscious and start violently picking at my acne until there's blood on my hands and face. When my session of picking is finished, they look at me like I'm some kind of fool. I do the same thing sometimes on my legs, arms, chest, and back. It's even become worse because there are these two girls that go to my school and when I'm sitting down minding my own business, they look directly at me, whisper something to the other, and laugh. I don't know if they're laughing at me acne, braces, or what. To make things worse, my dad's girlfriend is over my house ALL THE TIME and she always has something to say. My dad is madly in love with her and barely pays any attention to me. So not only am I a dermatillomaniac, but I'm basically a loner too. All of this has made me feel really depressed and insecure. I'm thinking about starting cutting my self, but that'll create more problems because I'm gonna have to worry about hiding it. Anyways, is there any to prevent me from starting self harm and is there anybody out there that's in the same situation??? (If this makes any difference, I'm a girl.)
20 Answers
samspade11
April 10, 2014
Have you tried talking to your family about how their comments make you feel? Most people feel like they are helping the situation but don't realize how hurtful they are. I'm sorry about your situation. Can you tell me more about what you have tried to clear up your acne or stop picking?
OBSESSED4
April 10, 2014

In reply to by samspade11

I never talked to my family about it, but they'll probably say that they will stopping saying things like that and forget about it and start again. For the acne, I used to use something my dermatologist prescribed for me. (forgot the name of it) Now I use proactive, but that barely works :/ To stop picking, I clipped my nails, but that only lasted for about 3 days since they grow back pretty fast and I used my teeth to pick at other parts of my body :(
samspade11
April 10, 2014

In reply to by OBSESSED4

It definitely wouldn't hurt to try... maybe show them some of the dermatillomania websites and forums like this so they can get a better understanding of your situation. I know that once me and my mother watched a skin picking special on TV and it really opened her eyes as to what I had been going through for all of these years. For me at least, my skin is extremely sensitive to prescriptions for acne. I used Proactive as well, but it only dries out my skin which leads to more picking. clipping nails is also a good idea. I'm not sure how comfortable you would be with trying this, but try to go without any make up. Make it a habit to not even look in the mirror after you shower. It sounds miserable, but this alone has cleared up my skin tremedously, and now I don't even think twice about it. Do you have any hobbies that can keep your hands busy? When I get that anxious feeling like I want to pick I clean something or do some knitting (surprisingly fun).
OBSESSED4
April 11, 2014

In reply to by samspade11

When would be the right time to show them? Usually the only times I see my family is when we all meet up at a restaurant or have a party for a special occasion over their house, and as bad as it sounds most of them are usually drunk during the party :/ Sorry if this is too complicated, and thank you sooooo much for your help.
samspade11
April 11, 2014

In reply to by OBSESSED4

Unfortunitely there really is no right time... in my case, I had been visiting my family one night and that show randomly came on. At first I got really embarassed because I have always been very secretive about my picking and even when my mom would confront me about it, I would avoid the subject. Ha, and the girl in the show even shares my name... og the irony... here's a clip of the episode: http://www.drphil.com/shows/show/2137/ But my mom and I sat through the entire 30 painful minutes and afterwards my mom said, "wow, I honestly had no idea what this has been like for you". After that, we sat and talked about it and it was such a relief to be able to talk to someone and get it off of my chest. She has a better understanding and I am getting better at being able to talk about it. I even most recently started opening up to my boyfriend about it whom I have been dating for six years. I'm telling you, it's amazing what a little education can do. In your situation maybe you could try making a special time to meet and talk about it. It will show them that this is important to you. Or maybe if your into social media you could do it that way... I really do wish you the best of luck!
samspade11
April 12, 2014

In reply to by OBSESSED4

She has just been a lot more supportive. Instead of scolding me for the picking, she is understanding of my condition. Now that we have talked about it, she is able to understand what triggers me. We were driving in the car a couple weeks ago, and I was picking at some dry skin, and without even saying anything she reached over and pulled my hand away from my face and we started talking about something to get my mind off of it. I think once you have put your trust in someone and are able to confide in them, you don't feel judged anymore. It is really liberating. Making yourself vulnerable to people is uncomfortable and scary, but once you have done it, you have nothing to hide from and it ends up being really empowering.
samspade11
April 13, 2014

In reply to by OBSESSED4

I've been picking for 12 years now and most stuff hasn't helped me kick it for good. In the past I have tried acne creams, Proactive, ect. but they all just dry out my face and make me want to pick more. Clipping and filing my nails worked for a little bit, but I always end up finding a way to still do it or use tweezers. Same thing with fake nails. I've tried hypnotherapy audio clips which seemed to help a little but I never could stick with that for very long. I also went to a therapist but she didn't help me. Right now, what has been helping the most is what I had mentioned in my previous comment about not wearing makeup. This has taken my focus off of my face and I have noticed that my urges to pick are few and far between since i hardly ever look in a mirror anymore. I would also suggest making a journal of when you pick the most, what leads up to it, how long, ect. This can help you understand your triggers and hopefully help you avoid them. If you pick when you are bored, you could try to wear gloves when you are just sitting around the house, that helped me sometimes, but not always since it's too easy to just slip them off. Maybe when you feel an urge coming on you could do a brisk walk around the block. Sometimes all you need is 10 minutes to redirect your mind and the feeling is gone. Take it day by day, and remember that every little success, is still a success! And don't get hard on yourself if you slip up. I am going on three months of no horrible picks. Have I slipped up and found myself in the mirror messing with my face? Sure, a few times. But I stopped myself and did not make a bloody mess of myself. They say it takes around 90 days to break a bad habit, if that is what you'd like to call it, so keep your chin up and never give up!
LiorL
April 21, 2014

In reply to by OBSESSED4

I haven't tried any creams or anything like that. I am still picking at my legs, arms, and face. For me the first thing to get myself MORE in control, it used to be much worse, was to recognize where and when and why I started picking. For me it usually happens when I'm under a lot of stress. I pick more when I'm in the bathroom and getting dressed. After I recognized that I started thinking if creative ways to busy myself and get my mind off needing to pick. Pretty much anything that keeps your hands and mind occupied works. I actually take a book to the bathroom (even when brushing my teeth) to get me to not look at myself in the mirror and start picking. It's still uncontrollable but hopefully this will start changing for all of us.
ninakpoole
May 20, 2014

In reply to by LiorL

My experience says that picking of acne is a very bad habit. Picking leads to increase in growth of acne. The only way to control growth of acne is to use natural moisturizer on it. Manuka honey helps to lighten the skin. Applying skin brightening products near the acne would help to cure them. Royal jelly also cure acne, daily application of royal jelly on affected area helps to lower the pain of acne. To know more about royal jelly navigate here. royal jelly
ninakpoole
May 20, 2014

In reply to by LiorL

My experience says that picking of acne is a very bad habit. Picking leads to increase in growth of acne. The only way to control growth of acne is to use natural moisturizer on it. Manuka honey helps to lighten the skin. Applying skin brightening products near the acne would help to cure them. Royal jelly also cure acne, daily application of royal jelly on affected area helps to lower the pain of acne. To know more about royal jelly navigate here. http://www.comvita.com/healthcare/royal-jelly.html
pickynikki03
April 14, 2014
Hey gurl ive had a picking problem since i was 13 now im 23 and still dealing with it! But dont worry i know i can stop and you can to! Ur so smart to be young and to know u need help thts very wise! I just fiqured out tht this is a addiction for me i think i was in denial or thought tht everybody picked and tht i jus had bad acne ...which i do but i make it much worse! I feel your pain i aviod goin places tht i want to go cause of my acne i have even called into work! In highschool i got made fum of jus a little and still now ppl will say things and it hurts i use to jus run away and cry but now i have learned tht if someone says something to me mean on purpose u better say somethin back if they say nice zit tell them my acne will go away but u cant fix stupid or somethin like tht it sounds immature but feels great! Some ppl say things because they dont understand how bad it is. And dont worry about those girls in school they have problems to all the mean girls i went to school with r pretty much losers now someday u will have beautiful teeth it will be worth it!and this may not be the same for you buy i dont even see anybody i went to highschool with most of them(at least those girls) will never see u again after highschool jus focus om your education dont let them bother so much you dont do good in school Success is the nest revenge! My family understands but they dont get it fully most people dont understand how someone can hurt themselves and then be upset about it i dont even understand it you have to relize its u who has this and u have to fix it.... i havnt found anything tht has stopped me completely right now jus a steady skim care regememt also i find qoutes whatever ones make me feel good and put them on my mirror u have to rember its a addiction and sometimes u will relapse i can go about 3 to 5 days then relapse but every time i go a little longer! Also my last peice of advice is get some good makeup if ur mom know how important this is maybe she can spend somr money for make up bare minerals compact powder is awesome if ur om a budget true match anything is great i know they say it clogs ur pores but its better than being coped in ur house tht will jus make it worse! Jus make sure u wash ur face at night amd maybe after school! Goodluck i know u dont knw me but i have been in ur shoes!!
KickinPickinGirl
July 15, 2014

In reply to by pickynikki03

Great advice^^ all of it but I'm going to look into the makeup suggestions!! The bare mineral & true match both I've never tried...so I'm def looking forward to this! I also read earlier that cover girl clean products work great. Again never tried yet. Good luck and please stay away from cutting.. A whole new can of worms that is def not worth opening if u can help it. Try talking to ur guidance Counsler at school if u trust him or her, maybe ur fav teacher if u have one u trust. But telling someone will be a huge burden lifted sweety. -Sincerely, Angela R- Love&Hugs/We All Deserve It Hope&Healing/We'll Always Need It {Active CSP Since '02}
maddie
July 14, 2014
I had a problem with touching my acne. I went to Korea and saw a product that you stick to keep you from picking. The patches/dots contain hydrocolloid and it kept me from not only touching them, but also allowed it to heal (extra bonus). I tried probably all the similar products in the states that are imported from China, but most just didn't STAY ON because the adhesive wasn't strong and it was really visible on my face. But I found some very recently manufactured in the states - Smartmed Cover-Dot Acne Dots. They're like MAGIC! It really stays on and it's almost clear unlike the other ones that claim to be clear. The price is a bit higher than the ones from other companies, but totally worth it because stays on and it's waterproof. I was completely skeptical, but it really works and best of all, it keeps you from picking at your acne. Hope that helps. Goodluck!
KickinPickinGirl
July 15, 2014

In reply to by maddie

Where do we get these things at?? Acne stick on dots?! -Sincerely, Angela R- Love&Hugs/We All Deserve It Hope&Healing/We'll Always Need It {Active CSP Since '02}

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