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alex56 , 24 Mar 2011

frustrated

This is kind of a vent of frustration with myself. I used to think the reason i started picking was because i moved 3 years ago, but the more i think about it, the more i realize how long ive been doing this. Ive been picking my scalp for 9 years, im 16. ever since i was little, me and my sister would pick the skin peeling off our feet and become obsessed with it. ive always picked my scabs. i look at pictures of me when i was about 9 and i had little scabs on my face, im guessing from picking. not nearly as bad as what my face looks like now but still. for the past 3 years ive tried picking every little bump on my face. it started with my face, then i started picking my chest (including my breasts) and my arms, back and legs. Now i have scabs and scars all over my face and body. I continue to try to stop picking. my scalp stings and hurts, ive made scabs the size of a dime on my face. i dont even have an acne problem, i CREATE my own acne by irritating everything. i keep saying im going to stop for good, but the longest i last is 3 days. its embarrassing and im sick of myself. idk what to do anymore, ive tried everything i can to help myself. im just stuck and dont know what to do.
7 Answers
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nomore
March 24, 2011
You need to let your skin heal and love yourself. I quit picking weeks ago. Now that I know I'm done for good, I've been using a microdermabrasion/chemical peel kit from olay. My skin looks better each day and I feel even more beautiful. My picking used to hold me back, now I realize I'm young and this is NOT how I want to spend my youth. I'm ready to get out and have fun! Also now that I know I'm done for good, I have some money in my savings. After about a month more of using this chemical peel/microdermabrastion kit I may consider getting a chemical peel from my doctor. I'm so excited. I feel so good about myself. Summer is coming up, you still have time to be the best you that you can be. Listen to this song...... i think my picking was fueled by low self esteem and low self esteem fueled my picking. its a vicious cycle, the choice to end it is yours alone. There is so much more out there... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g2gy1Evb1Kg
nomore
March 24, 2011
ALSO you're only 16. i started picking when i was 14 and now i'm 21 and i just quit about a month ago. Trust me. You don't want to spend your 21st birthday locked up in your dorm room like me, wishing you could go out and have fun, but refuse to because of your dreadful skin. You're young, you have time to heel. You are capable. Do your best in highschool because you still have a chance to bring up your GPA enough to have a scholarship freshman year of college.. unlike me. DON'T BE LIKE I WAS! just sayin. if you need a friend, i'm here for you. It's hard being a teenager
alex56
March 24, 2011
thank you so much for replying. and congratulations on stopping! that must be such a relief. i keep trying to stop while im young cuz im scared ill continue doing it when im older and the scars will be to deep to heal. but yea because of my skin i dont really like going out. i do have low self esteem, i really try to be confident in myself but it always seems to hard because im not satisfied with myself and always want to change something. how did you stop picking? just willpower? or did you have help from something? the song is very inspiring! i feel like ive heard it before :) thank you for your help!
adecadeisenough
March 25, 2011
I'm 27 and I started picking probably sophomore year of HS so I understand what you're going through. If I could go back, I'd want to seek professional treatment right away. I don't know how I would have gone about that- because I didn't want my parents to know then and I don't want them to know now but I really think you should pursue it. A regular dr. or dermatologist can help- at least at first. That way you don't need to ask your parents to see a psychologist (maybe not an issue for you, but would have been for me). Some anti-anxiety or anti-depressent could help along with some behavioral therapy. You're young- you got the time, the motivation, and the focus. I really think you should devote yourself to quitting using every possible means. I think it gets harder as you get older because life happens and you have more things competing for your time and attention. Quitting will be exhausting but give it everything you got! Keep us updated. Let us support you!
alex56
March 25, 2011
thats exactly what im scared of! im scared the longer i do it the harder it will be to stop. my parents do know about my problem and although my mom did have an obsession with plucking her eyebrows and picking her fingers, she still doesnt seem to understand. ive talked to her about seeing a psychologist and she just says we dont have the money for that, so im really trying to do this on my own but its so hard. but im not going to give up! thank you so much for the support :) ill make sure to keep posting!
alex56
March 26, 2011
today is my first day (for the hundredth time) that im trying to stop picking. i did pretty good, im mainly focusing on trying not to pick my face and body right now. then once ive achieved that, i will focus on my scalp. i didnt pick my face at all today or anything except for a bump on my chest. Im kind of upset still because i made some bad scabs on my face and chest yesterday but im trying to heal them. and since i was trying not to pick my face and body ive been picking my scalp constantly and it stung horribly when i washed my hair tonight =/ but ill work on that later. So far so good! ill keep posting :)
alex56
March 31, 2011
I havent been doing very good on not picking -_- the first few days i did alot better, not picking as much, and when i did i didnt pick really bad and make scabs or anything. but i went out yesterday, and i wore make up and when i got home late last night i picked my face and chest really bad. for some reason after wearing makeup, my face feels really gross and i just feel disgusting, then i look at it closely and see all these little bumps. i dont knoww, im really trying. Im gunna try again though! startingg todayy

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