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valentine , 06 Sep 2013

Zero tolerance policy?

Hi All. I'm back after a long time of not picking because I've started it up again. It's limited to my KP bumps on my arms and my bikini area. It's way better than it used to be but after being pick free, any picking feels like failure--even though I know that relapses are common. Anyway, I'm going to try and post here daily for a while. I am trying a zero-tolerance policy per my therapist's suggestion, so I can't do what I do when I tell myself, 'oh, I'll just get this one spot and then I'll stop.' Anyone else interested in coming along for the ride? Today is day zero for me. Hopefull, I'll get to Day 1 tomorrow night. Wish me luck!
64 Answers
valentine
September 07, 2013
Day 1. Have a lot of work to do this weekend so extra vulnerable to picking (when I space out at the computer, especially). Just popped one KP bump so posting here to prevent myself from doing more. I wish I knew a way to get rid of them without using harsh bodywashes and creams (I recently broke out in hives from over-using those things). It's so tempting to want to pop them all to be "rid" of the problem but I know it will look awful, take a long time to heal, and still won't solve the problem because the bumps just come back. I know nobody but me can even see them so I have to try and chill out about touching them. Argh! This is a tough challenge!
valentine
September 08, 2013
Day 1, evening. Popped 2 more KP spots. Got out if mirror fast. Argh. Hoping for better tomorrow.
valentine
September 10, 2013
Day 2 more successful. Popped one bump on each arm, then stopped. And letting all the bikini area heal (except for two spots, nearly perfect.)
bumble_bee
September 10, 2013
Good luck valentine! Sounds like you're doing great so far. I have trouble with my face, but recently have started picking at and squeezing bumps on my upper arms and thighs. I'm starting today on my own 5-day challenge. I think we can do this. ~Bee
bumble_bee
September 10, 2013
Hey, I'm not feeling so great as well. I didn't break any new skin on my face, but I peeled off scabs from healing spots on my face. Now the spots are even more red and visible. Let's just try to take one day at a time. No set, long-term goal, but like you said, the zero-tolerance policy, each and every day. Try to be nice to yourself tonight; we can't beat ourselves up anymore for these small mistakes. Let's learn from them, and remember that tomorrow's a new day. We CAN do this. :) ~Bee
valentine
September 11, 2013

In reply to by bumble_bee

Good points, Bee! One day at a time is the right approach. And sometimes it's one hour at a time. I saw my therapist yesterday and got a little pep talk from him as well so I'm feeling a little better, generally. Best of luck today...
valentine
September 12, 2013
24-hours pick free so I'm restarting my count. Here's to making it to Day 2 without too much trouble...
bumble_bee
September 12, 2013

In reply to by valentine

I've also made it to day 2 without too much trouble thankfully. I also saw a dermatologist today and despite how I felt about the visit or the amount of prescriptions she prescribed, I think it will prove to be helpful. I already use Benzaclin gel on my face at night. She prescribed Bactroban as an antibiotic, just in case I create a new wound on my face. Also, metrogel, which is supposed to help with rosacea or any redness. She said I could also use Benzaclin on my arms. I asked about a moisturizer, and she suggested Cetaphil. Hope this is helpful or may encourage you to see a dermatologist!
valentine
September 14, 2013
Friday the 13th is bad luck. Picked both arms while on phone, zoning out. Hope for better tomorrow.
valentine
September 16, 2013
Saturday and Sunday picked once. Making progress!
valentine
September 16, 2013
In today's NY Times, a study showing that behavior therapy really helps OCD: http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/09/16/behavior-therapy-aids-obsessive-compulsive-disorder/?src=recg
CindyR
September 17, 2013
CindyR I have been reading a lot about this lately. Zero Tolerance sounds like you are using your will power to stop. I am not suggesting what you should or should not do, if you can stop that way fine but I see several places on this and other sites that will power will not work. There may be another way. I recently had a experience with acupuncture that seemed to reduce my urges. I am going to look into this some more. I am pretty willing to try anything at this point.
edhilo
September 17, 2013
Hello, I am super new to this site. But I think it could be a huge help. For one, understanding every day that I have a problem, and when I pick my life becomes unmanageable-- For example: I will skip class, isolate, feel constantly unworthy, call in sick to work, and spend thousands of dollars on cosmetics, literarily trying to erase bad skin with peels and harsh products... My therapist told me to try and break down the day if I keep picking, like, set a timer for an hour or two, so that when you want to pick you know I have this much time left, and keep increasing the time until you can manage a day, a week, ect. Also when I have completed an hour without picking (even unconsciously), its great! Its worth feeling excited about. And then getting some sort of reward when you can complete your goals... This is just my advice because right now I cant imagine not picking for a day, or a week! But I KNOW its possible. So just look at the positives (as cliché as that is), because not picking for a day or even a week, seems amazing to me, and gives ME hope that this wont last forever. So thanks! And you came back and posted about it immediately, which is huge. I tend to spiral out of control very quickly instead of admitting I cant do it alone. Progress not Perfection.
valentine
September 17, 2013
Thanks for the feedback, fellow pickers. Good point about will power. I don't think it works, not alone. I am employing a 12-step model to my stopping picking plan as well. So far, I've picked at at least 2-3 pores a day since re-starting this journal but that's still better than in prior periods of my life. Just really trying to amass some days totally pick free.... so fingers crossed...
Jenstar8
September 17, 2013
I'm down for the zero tolerance policy because it has been my experience that once you start you can't stop, it snowballs (for me personally) into a full blown massacre. My last was this past Saturday 9/14 & the emotional trauma was probably at its worst this last time. I know what I'm doing to myself & how mad I'm going to be when finally for some unknown reason I get myself to stop, if anyone is in the house w me I usually stop just to shut them up about it, but once they're gone I'm right back at it tenfold. I cannot comprehend what is going on in my mind w this thing. It's so irrational I simply cannot make sense of it. People ask & I tell them it's my form of self mutilation, but I can't explain why I even feel compelled to self mutilate. So, I haven't picked since Sunday, only been doing damage control physically & mentally so I too am going w zero tolerance, I'm just not going to pick at the nothing on my freaking face anymore damnit!
valentine
September 17, 2013

In reply to by Jenstar8

Great to read you, Jenstar. I'm resetting the counter today. I have therapy in a little bit and am going to suggest to my therapist that I also check in with him daily, via text, to confirm that I haven't picked. I'm taking it an hour at a time right now!

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